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female
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anonymous
writes: ive been married for 5 years now but i cant get another man out of my head. ive known him for some 5 years more than my husband but we never got together. Before i got married i went to visit him and we kissed, but since that night 7 years ago we have never spoken about it with each other. Ive been told that one night he told his family and they told him to come and get me before I was married but he didnt. I want to know why he didnt but I feel if I ask him we will loose the strong friendship we have. Any suggestions? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Juliette  +, writes (12 August 2006):
 I would say it depends on your current relationship. I know people do it but really people aren't things we should just trade in for someone else. The husband you have is the one you know, warts and all. If you were happy with your relationship before this intervention I would say try to stop seeing the new guy whilst you sort your feelings out for your husband. I am warning you, having been in that position myself, it is too easy to look for faults and excuses and reasons to follow your new love. If he has waited that long, then he will still be there. If you relent and go to him out of familiarity with your husband and the new man is exciting and inviting, you could end up with nothing as when you get to live with him for 5 years you may find you have jumped from the frying pan to the fire.
A
male
reader, apollo +, writes (12 August 2006):
do u really care.i mean would u consider leaving ur husband for this man.just leave it in the past and focus on ur husband, because if u lose him u ll regret it.
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