A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so here's my problem, it's one of those two girl problems. About a year an a half ago, I met my current girlfriend, who happens to be my first, and we've been going out since then, she's the only girl I've ever been physically intimate. It's been a great relationship so far, and I am in love with her. However, lately I've been spending a great deal of time with a girl I met online, we've only spent time online, and we've gotten pretty close. Recently she told me that she had more that friendly feelings to me, and I had developed similar feelings for her. Once the information was shared, we kind of moved onto a more girlfriend/boyfriend relationship, we spend like all day talking, we chat on webcams, and, I am ashamed to say, I basically cheated on my girlfriend with myself and the online girl using webcams.The online girl knows that I have a girlfriend, but the online girl wants me to leave my girlfriend to be with her instead. I kinda feel like scum cheating on my girlfriend, and I'm not even sure if I want to be with the girl I cheated with more. Having to reject one of them is really going to hurt, but I know it isn't fair to either of them to not choose. I'm just looking for a little guidance on how to choose.Distance is a small factor as my girlfriend is only 45mins away, but the online girl is about 6 hrs away, but online communication makes up for it a bit.P.S. Online Girl is engaged, but it's not that much of a factor as she has said she doesn't love him, just that she's will be with him just to avoid being alone, and having her two kids grow up without a father.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionResponse to Emilyanswers:She's engaged, and HE is her backup plan, she wants to be with me, she only plans to be with him so she isn't alone.Pretty much, except it's past-tense it wasn't right, wasn't fair to either of them.You're probably right, I should, and that would mean I should be with the girl from online.Maybe, maybe not, I don't actually get to see or talk with my girlfriend more than once a week, if that, and only for a few hours. She hasn't seen her fiance in 10 months, because he keeps finding other things to do, and when they do talk, it's mostly him berating her for something, or calling her stupid. If I were with her, we'd see each other more often than that, less often than I see my girlfriend, but we'd also spend tons more time "together."
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (18 October 2008):
So she's engaged but she's keeping you as a plan B to see if she gets a better offer?
And you have a girlfriend but you are cheating on her with a girl who has promised to marry someone.
I think you should definitely split up with your girlfriend as she deserves better than you.
As for if this girl actually leaves her fiance? Who knows! You'll probably end up cheating on each other anyway so does it really matter?
Good Luck!! xx
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