A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello everyone! So my problem is pretty straightforward - I need help approaching a guy. Usually, this wouldn't be so difficult for me, but the circumstances are a little stickier than anything I've ever had to deal with. Basically, I'm a freshman in college and I have a townhouse with 2 of my friends. Since we moved in, we have developed a really close and very nice group of friends (most of whom are guys and are our neighbors). I've become particularly close to one guy who is also my neighbor. We hang out nearly everyday even if we have nothing to do. Recently, we have been flirting A LOT (playing around, holding hands, and even cuddling) and we talk about what it would be like if we were together. In the process of this, I've actually developed a real thing for him.Normally, I would just go out on a limb and either make a move or try to initiate something. But I'm torn here because he's my neighbor and an integral part of my friend group. I can handle rejection, but I can't handle the awkwardness that may follow and I certainly don't want to compromise our friendship. But in addition to this, I'm also torn because I don't know if he's just playing around with me or if he's sincerely interested. I know I must sound really whiny right now, but I really do need your help. Any thoughts or advice would be greatly appreciated. :)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (19 November 2012):
My advice would be for you to have a solid idea of what your long term goals are. Allow some flexibility in your planning, because life happens. Remember to enjoy today, don't put off happiness, to some uncertain future.
And, last but not least. Find a guy who knows how to ask a girl out on a date. Or better yet a guy willing to court you. I find it shocking that this friend of yours is willing to talk to you about how fun it would be to be "together", but isn't man enough to take you to a movie and dinner.
FA
A
female
reader, SomeoneLikeYou +, writes (19 November 2012):
Hi!
I totally understand your situation because I'm in one like it myself. It's hard to give you good advice but for my own situation I decided to just wait and see. Because it would be terrible to ruin our friendship. As long as you feel good with the flirting and stuff, nothing is wrong. But there will come a time where you maybe start to be jealous and really start thinking of him as your boyfriend. Look out for that!
I hope you find a good way to handle this. I really do!
grtz
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