A
female
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*una~
writes: My boyfriend has been through a divorce before he met me. He also had a daughter with his ex-wife. This fail relationship hurted him very much, which I feel changed his view on marriage and child.I was thinking about it, and started to get worry if he will enjoy his second time wedding, or second time having a baby with me.Honestly, I'm sad at the fact I'll always be his second time. I know I'll probably end up getting more excited because it'll be my first time (planning the wedding, holding our baby, buying our first house).My family and close relatives never remarried before, therefore, I'm a bit inexperience about relationship that involves divorce.Does anyone have any advice or comments about my concern?
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female
reader, Astrid +, writes (30 September 2006):
I think it is going to work darling it is sure he has really thought about it and really wants to try and marry you dear. I do not think your baby is the second,he is to be the second baby it's to be his first baby with you the one he's chosen to be really happy for the rest of his life after overcoming an awful previous nasty relationship, I think little babies are charming and attrac more attention form their dad than elder ones maybe the thing you should worry is trying your son gets on with his elder brother and you all become a family through all the previous backstage
I know this will work
good luck an lots of love
A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (30 September 2006):
Before I had a baby I was always worried that when I was with someone that already had a child my child wouldn't be as special as the first and that I would be holding my first child and it would be all special and mean so much to me and he would have already done this before and it wouldn't mean as much or be a special moment for him because of this, especially if the baby is of the same sex as the child he already had.
I now have a baby and my babies Dad has a child from a previous relationship, both my baby and his previous child are boys, he loves them both the same, they both have a special place in his heart and it was just as special to him as it was for me, and because he had already had a baby he knew how important it was to make the most of each and every moment as of regreting the missed moments with his first child.
I now realise that just because it is the second time for him doesn't make it any less special, important or mean less, and although it was the second time no situation is the same each time round therefore making it just as special for it's own reasons, and being the second time round he already knows how special these occasions are therefore giving him the chance to put more effort.
Good luck, hope this helps :o)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2006): to be honest if he cant see wot he has with you,is nothing like his past marriage,then he dont deserve you,we learn by our past mistakes and aim to get it right,he's been given a second chance to be happy,and have a new family and a new start,my own experience was simular to yours and its worked out fine.
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