A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i have been tottaly in love with my one of my best friends (female) for quite a while now but i know she dosent feel the same way about me, what should i do ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010): It's a really tricky situation, I know how you feel. All I can say is just try to forget about her and move on with your own life. Do things that you enjoy and just concentrate on yourself rather than her. Good luck and it will get easier with time :-) xx
A
male
reader, kevin3007  +, writes (26 July 2010):
 man we're in the same boat i fell for my best friend too for ages and it took me a lot of courage to tell him that i loved him and once i did it let's say i lost him as a friend too till now i still love him but he's not treating me like befor and he's avoiding me it's really painfull we can't even shake hands any more ...wish i can stop loving him.
MY DEAR YOU SHOULD FORGET ABOUT HER FOR GOOD YOU DON'T WANT TO TASTE THAT PAIN ...SAVE YOUR HEART AND DON'T BREAK IT.......GOOD LUCK (REALLY HOPE SHE WILL LOVE YOU BACK).
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010): der_zyniker is right.If you don't KNOW that she doesn't feel the same way, you should tell her. Don't tell her you're in love with her and have been forever, that will just freak her out because it will seem like a betrayal. Just tell her you are her friend and have been thinking about her a lot lately and ask if she would like to explore the possibility of being more than friends.If she says no, then you should tell her you care about her and don't want to hurt her, but the relationship is painful to you and you need some time away from her. After all, you cannot really be her friend if you are hurting all the time when you're being there for her. If she really is your friend, she'll understand.Take some space. Don't call her or ask her to hang out, go make some new friends and look some other places for romance.If you know she isn't interested and you see her every day at school (i.e. you can't get away from her) then you should just refrain from sharing intimate details about each other. It's okay to tell her once that you've been thinking about her a lot lately, that you cannot help what you feel, but it's not okay to pressure her into feeling something she doesn't. If she doesn't feel the same way, no amount of being nice will convince her. You can even tell her once that you understand that, but that you aren't going to pretend you DON'T have those feelings.I know none of this is easy, but you will feel a great relief once you let her go. Later down the line when you've had enough time to get over her, maybe you can really be friends.
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A
male
reader, der_zyniker +, writes (26 July 2010):
I would just forget about her. I know that it's not easy. I'm gay and I love one of my best friends and i ended up telling him. He avoided me and I just obsessed over it and that only made things worse between us and made me miserable all the time. If she doesn't feel the same way about you, you have to move on. Dwelling on this isn't healthy.
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