A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years and really love him to pieces. We've often talked about marriage and I know that he is proposing really soon :-). Over the past few months though, I've been kinda falling for this other guy. He's great, funny, sexy, and I can't stop thinking about having sex with him. I would never betray my boyfriend that way, but I can't stop thinking about sex with this guy. Even when I don't see him for a while, I'm thinking about him and fantasizing about him. What on earth does it mean when I know that I'm in love with my boyfriend? Does this mean I'm falling out of love? Is it a bad decision to get married when I'm thinking about someone else? Our relationship is great, and I don't feel like there is anything missing. We've been together since we were both 20.. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (6 August 2010):
 Yeah, this is pretty normal. I've been with my fella for 5 years, married for one and just in the last 6 months I got my first crush since being with my guy. It really flipped me out, and I felt absolutely horrible and guilty and started questioning our whole relationship. But, the reality is - my fella is great and I adore him to pieces. Our relationship is really good. So why mess with it? Marriage is work, and that doesn't mean just working to fix your marital issues, it's also working on yourself and resisting urges.
I'm sure there has been a lady or two who have caught your boyfriends eye over time, but he always picks you!
Fantasizing about Mr. Hunk is all well and good. As long as your actions reflect loyalty to your man, there's nothing to worry about.
Unless you really feel that you and your boyfriend don't belong together, or he treats you badly, or you don't feel attracted to him at all, stick with the guy who you love long term. Good luck, sweetness!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2010): I have been in this position, in a solid relationship, things were going great, then i met someone completely out of the blue, she was amazing, well we got talking then we hooked up online, talked some more then decided to meet her. I'm now in love with this girl... i love my current partner also so don't want to be... but i am. My life is a mess at the moment, part of me doesn't regret meeting the new girl, because she really is amazing, but now i've got some really big decisions to make and that is the hardest thing you could ever imagine.
My advice to you is if you are truly as happy as you say you are then steer clear of this new guy... If you don't, you'll be where i am and trust me, it's not a nice place.
If you do want something to do with this guy, get out of your current relationship first, it will be a whole lot easier, difficult at first but at least there are no lies.
Don't cheat, it really isn't worth it in the end because all you'll ultimately do is hurt people you care for and love, will feel ashamed of yourself and be in pain yourself... i've never cheated before this and beleive me, it is not a good place to be...
Good Luck and i hope for your sake, you make the right decision.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2010): Hi Sweetness,
You're a young beautiful princess. It is your choice who would you like to be with, and the winner out of them shall feel lucky.
Think about it and go for whomever your heart desires, and be prepared for stupid and immature reactions from your current bf if things didn't go his way. If he started bothering or harassing you then report him to the police. This would stop him immediately. It works like magic with losers, always.
Have all the fun you can. Life is not for eternity and you, again, are a young beautiful princess.
Emily
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2010): You know, they do say it's normal to feel attracted to someone else while being in a relationship. However, if you can't stop thinking about them, fantasizing about them, you find yourself putting him before your boyfriend then there's a problem.
You have to remember, 5 years is quite a while, and these sort of things happen quite a lot so I've heard. Just don't let your thoughts control you and let you make the wrong decision. If you love your boyfriend as much as you say, you need to cut all contact from the other guy, try not to think about him again, live a happy life with your boyfriend and never mention it again.
Like chigirl said, it all depends if you still feel physically attracted to your boyfriend. Because if you don't, the'd be no point in continuing the relationship!
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (5 August 2010):
 Do you want to have sex with your boyfriend as well, or only this other guy? Are you no longer physically attracted to your boyfriend?
Depending on your answer I can give you my thoughts... but it really all depends on whether you still think your boyfriend is sexy too, or just this new guy...
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