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I'm in love with a gay guy!

Tagged as: Friends, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 October 2008) 15 Answers - (Newest, 5 November 2008)
A age 26-29, anonymous writes:

What do you do if you love a guy...and this guy is gay? I told him i loved him AFTER he told me he was gay.....so im tellin him theres no point to say what i want to say. I gave in and said what i wanted, when i did a few minutes later he said he had to go..... Im confused, hes confused.... Its a little weird taking to him now, I've loved him for months now and neer knew he was gay........ Help/Advice will be wonderful, Thanks

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I know what you mean; ppl sayn they are some age just to get you then you find out they are some much older.

We would do anything...just play video games and fun of each other.

We're busy all the time, so i dont think id be able to. I rarely have time to update you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2008):

Yeah, internet dating can be risky. It's hard to trust someone you don't really know. I've heard of men saying they're 15 when they're 40!

You've really been a good, caring, friend to this guy. It sounds like he's back into living again :)

I think your dad is protective of you because he cares so much about you. Some friends I made in the past got me into trouble, and I regret it to this day. :(

I think your dad would approve of going to a church youth group (here I go again :) to hang out with teenagers. Maybe if you ask him about it he can check into it...?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

we have a lot in common too...

If you say im too good for him...okay.

I wanna stay friends, but my dad doest like him...so its like um...gee i have friends but i cant talk to them. I was invited by Brandon and Ali to go hang out but i cant cuz dad said no.

I guess he's over Ali, and now is into another girl. Thats good, i dont wanna see him hurt again by some one he met over the internet. Im not sayin internet dating is bad, im just sayin i dont want to see him hurt.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2008):

I can understand how confused you're getting...

If you ask me,I think you're too good for him :)smile

Maybe you should just stay friends and let him sort his feelings...

If he brings up guys, ask him, "Are you really going to give up on the dream of a caring, pretty, soft, girl to love, and love you back?" You'll really give him something to think about.

Anyways, I wish there was a way I could help you find a youth group...I'll just say a prayer for you to find one, or for someone to let you know...Take Care!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Im thinkin maybe he said he's gay because of this guy. Found out a few days ago, hes now talking with another guy.....Whats going on with the girl thing, im kinda like an owl. They're asking me to tell each other 'hi' when i see whom ever. Then they go off to talk by themselves. I dont get out much, so i dont know anyone that goes to youth groups.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008):

Well you're definetly succeeding to get his mind off his 'break up'...because of your support, he hasn't done anything bad yet. I think you even put 'girls' on his mind! (I think that guy was just giving him attention to make him feel special and he took it as love...but it wasn't real...just miss-placed feelings.)

Keep letting him know he has alot going for him!

Play a game and ask him 5 things he's grateful/thankful for in his life...that can change a bad attitude into great! :)

By the way, my daughter is about your age...she meets alot of fun/nice/cool guys at youth group on Wednesday Nights at church. You should go too...do you know anyone that goes to a teenager youth group? I think you'll really like it!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2008):

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...He's good at video games...other things im not sure about. He's been told that if he smoked he might lose a friend of many years. Then after he told me that, he would become a drunk. I just found out he happens to kind of like a friend of ours (girl)....im a little confused on that. However he said he claimed to be gay then turns it around and says he likes a girl.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2008):

You are a good friend to him, and he knows this deep down.

He's hurting, so naturally he would say he doesn't want a new girlfriend right now. It takes time to heal the heart, and you're really helping him get his feelings out.

Smoking will only make him feel more miserable, so if you could tell him he has alot going for him, that should help him feel a little better:

What is he good at? any sports? playing music? skills? gets good grades? (he already knows you think he's cute:-)

A sincere compliment gives a boost to a persons confidence. If you encourage him, he'll think less of his hurt each day.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

He said he would let the perfect girl go by...or guy. Now he wants to smoke..i've tried to stop him, its not working. He doesnt care about himself... he's told me that. I've told him i care...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2008):

Well, his feelings will be hurt for awhile. If you could tell him your sorry this has happened to him and that you'd take the pain away if you could, you'll make him feel better. Just knowing you care gives a closer friendship.

Maybe he hasn't dated girls because the right one hasn't come along..??

Someday he might look at you different and care more for You.

If you say a prayer and leave it in Gods' hands, everything will be o.k.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

This guy broke up with him. Now he wants to give up on dating....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you.

He says he likes a guy from the UK....I did talk to him today, we talked as if what was said yesterday never happend. He claims to be gay because he doesnt really see girls in a loving way, although he has many girlfriends. Maybe it could be a phase....hes 16...im 13

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2008):

It's o.k. you've fallen in love with him. Honesty is part of a real relationsihp.

Even though he believes he's 'gay' may not be certain. You're both at an age where sexuality is confusing yet wonderful at the same time.

Last week on this site, a guy thought he was gay because his relationships with girls weren't successful.

So it's more complex than people think.

If he's uncomfortable around you for now, just continue to be his friend...his feelings may turn around...

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (21 October 2008):

TELLULAH agony auntDarling, he is either gay or not. Nothing you say will have changed his mind about his sexuality. Even he cant do that.

You have to understand that he is not going to love you anymore than a mate. Are you prepared to except that?

I have some male Gay friends and I love them dearly, but I never think of them in any other way than I do my girlfriends. All the same, they are so lovely to be around I can see why you are mixed up. XX

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A female reader, VictoriaK United States +, writes (21 October 2008):

VictoriaK agony auntIf you really love this guy, and he is truly homosexual then I suggest that you just be friends, I mean who knows, it could be a phase?? But, it's better to be friends than nothing at all right?? As for what to do, I would try and get out and meet new friends, maybe you'll find a great guy! Try it out, and keep us posted on what happens. Good Luck, and sorry I wasnt much of a help, but I've never been in this situation before.

Victoria~

P.S. Message me for anything you may need, I will do my best to help you.

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