A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey basically i've realised over the past yr i am unfortunately inlove with one of my best friends who does not find girls of my physical attributes attractive and has said so, but i still get occassional "moments" where i feel we really connect and there could be something there. anyhow i've held off saying anything as i didn;t want to wreck our friendship(we are quiet close) but now we're all graduating adn i probably will never see him again(realities of men keeping in touch when moving away) so do i risk it or leave it be. partially i'm worried about wrecking the memories of our friendship and making him feel uncomfortable but equally i'd hate to regret never acting, what do you think am i crazy and should keep quiet or have i been ignoring what could possibly be amazingPS i know he's perfect for me i'm just not sure he could feel like that bout me
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female
reader, Artistry  +, writes (10 July 2008):
 Hi there, If it were I, the thing I would want to do, would
be to continue, to be best friends with him. Sometimes, best buddies are more intimate than boyfriend and girlfriend, without the sex, because they share so much. I know you want more, but he should be the one, to make the ultimate move, be sure you have his address or e-mail address and stay in touch. If you make a move on him, so to speak, you risk rejection, and making the relationship uncomfortable. If you are willing to take that chance, then go for it. It is my opinion, though, that if he wanted to have a different relationship with you, he would have acted by now. He likes you, as the two of you are, very good friends. Do not fret over it, it could be worse. Look for someone who connects with you, on a different level, you will find that person. I remember being on a cruise vacation once, and I had a serious crush on one of the band members, I would see him, every now and then and thought about him all the time. I was a lot thinner and thought I looked pretty good, and I was trying to see if I could get his attention. Well, one night we went up to the disco, and there he was, with this probably 300 pound, very attractive in the face woman. I was baffled, but the lesson was, different people have different tastes. He was not into thin, so she lucked out. You will find someone who cares for you and you will be happy, let this one go on his way. You want a person who wants you, the way you want them, it doesn't work otherwise. Love yourself, and enjoy your life, your partner in life will find you, believe it, until then be your own best friend. Take care always
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