A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Ive been involved with a married man for 6months. at first it was all about the fun. he is a very attractive man, but i was not inlove with him.As the months past, i grew to like him more. I knew since the beginning what i was letting myself into, but i justified it with the fact that im still young and im not causing anyone harm by just having a fling. But i was wrong...deep down i knew that what i was doing was disgusting and sooooo wrong.I got to know him as we started to spend more time together. He treats me like a princess. Tells me that his marriage is on the rocks and promised me that there was no kind of intemacy between them.What made me fall for him was the fact that i was never treated so good by any guy before. I liked it. i enjoyed the attention. he later told me that he loves me, but i didnt say anything.I can see that he really like me, but i dont want to be in this anymore. He is 10 years older than i am. i spoke to him about it, and he always have something better to say. I need to get out of this. I feel so guilty and i put myself in his wife shoes. i hate hurting people and i would never want her to find out. even if they do have a bad marriage, i dont want to add to it or be the reason he leaves his wife.Can someone please help me. I need to end this as soon as possible. i explained to him that i feel guilty and that whatever i do that hurts or is bad, will come back to me.But he always tells me that there is nothing between him and his wife, that they are more of a "team". I asked him before what his plans are with me..his intentions. He said that he loves me and that he wants to be with me, but he cant give me a date or time that he will leave his wife. This makes me hang in the air. I dont know when he'll leave and in the mean time i just have to hang around, which i dont think is fair. On this he said that i should enjoy the moment and enjoy not knowing what will happen tomorrow."this is the beauty of life, not knowing what tomorrow holds for us". I agree with that, but not my heart...my heart does not agree with that.He has become very controlling. He doesnt like me having friends of the opposite sex. he says that all man wants to be friends with me just to get in my pants...as if i go around sleeping with every guy i meet.im at the age, 22, where i go out, meet new people, work on my relationships with friends. ive always had alot of friends, guys and girls, people that i know. But since im seeing this married man, its not allowed at all. If i go out clubbing, im suppose to dress "decent". he checks up on my facebook and knows about everything that happens on my profile.Ive fallen for him big time...but im not ready for someone to tell me who i can and cannot have as friends. im not ready for someone to tell me what to wear and which clubs i can go to.Especially when he is not mine.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2011): Your married man is manipulating you. And you are allowing him to.
Thank goodness u have come to your sense that he belongs to someone else. I am pretty sure hos wife doesn't even know that they have marital problems and that he "doesn't love her".
Well you have a choice to make.
LoveGirl
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