A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:We've been together over 2 years. We've talked about marriage and kids and I really think, even though we are young, we're going to be together for a long time and I see him when I think of raising a family together. We got together when we were 17 and 18. We were both virgins. At first I loved the fact that we were each other's firsts but now I guess I'm slightly insecure. I guess I'm scared that as the years go by he will grow regretful of not "playing the field" and being the "lad" all/most his friends are. Ii trust he won't cheat on me but I'm paranoid that he's constantly thinking/having the urge to sleep with other women because he's only ever been with one.He has said himself that if he was single he would probably be having one night stands and going to strip clubs, and as sleazy as I personally think strip clubs are and even though one night stands aren't my thing even if I was single, I realise that many single guys do it so I can't be angry at him for saying he would if he was single; although it's not nice to think about. But because he's said this I feel like I'm holding him back from having the care-free fun, no-strings-attached attitude/behaviour that most 20 year old men enjoy. How can I stop being so paranoid about this?I unserstand I'm also probably overthinking and that my concerns many not be valid but I can't help it!
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both virgins, insecure, one night stand Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (6 September 2014):
 A friend of mine is in his 50s, married close to 30 years, and he's only ever been with his wife. To the extent he ever was dissatisfied with their relationship it wasn't about sex or wanting to try someone new. So it is possible. It depends on the guy.
A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (6 September 2014):
The truth is that he probably will with time, as youost likely will too. The other side to the story is that people who have experienced having sex with other people STILL can get bored. It's just part of a changing relationship over time.
There's no way to know how long it may take. For some it happens quickly, for others it takes years. And yes, there are some who never tire of their partners.
For you guys it will be awhile. You've already been together for a long time for your age, so you are probably pretty compatible with each other.
The key is to not let intimacy, affection, and sex get boring, forgotten, or monotonous. Keep things exciting and new. Never let him feel like you aren't in to him any more.
Don't worry, you're fine for now. As your relationship changes you can figure out how to deal with it at that time.
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