| A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I'm deeply hurt, and I feel void. I've been feeling like this for a while, like my life is empty, like I wish my life wasn't so dull. I can't cope with my emotions. And last night, something terrible happened.I was with my, now I suppose, ex boyfriend. We were hanging out, with my laptop. He noticed I had been online on MSN. He doesn't trust me, based on things I did in the past (before I dated him). He started demanding I show him my contacts list, and I asked him, if, in return, he'd show me his and also his web history. He said it was different, that he had reasons not to trust me and therefore had a right to know what I do online, but that he had done nothing to break my trust so he has a right to privacy.He started asking a lot of questions regarding the past, as usual. I answered them, but I started getting annoyed and upset. I started raising my voice. I started crying a bit. He got mad that I was crying. I told him how he had done things not in the past, but while in the relationship that had broken my trust. He said what he had done wasn't as bad as what I had done, that he hadn't even cheated on me. I told him what I did was of a higher magnitude, yes, but that it had happened two years before I'd even met him. He insisted he was right, and as he saw me getting more frustrated and crying more, he laughed at me, told me my concerns were stupid and that I was a nutcase and mentally ill.So I punched him straight in the eye. He left.I feel miserable. Not so much for having punched HIM, but for having got to the point of actually punching someone. I also feel miserable that the man I love, and who supposedly loves me back thinks I have a mental problem for feeling the way I feel, for making fun of my feelings, which I think are valid even if he doesn't understand them. I may not understand his feelings sometimes, and his feelings annoy me most of the time, but I never ignore them or laugh at him because of them. I guess we're broken up for good now. But I feel even more empty now and like life makes no sense. It makes me wish that I was living in an actual fairy tale, with magical fairies and all sorts of fantastic things, because I feel life is so dull and awful. what can I do to get in touch with reality and start enjoying life, as is, again? I've lost interest in everything I once enjoyed.
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female
reader, jada101  +, writes (5 April 2010):
 Frist of all what you did in the past is the past. You wasn't with him when you did whatever it was that you did. you have to start loveing yourself befor you start loving sombody. Find yourself. What's wrong. What happend that makes you think that life is so bad
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2010): Congratulations! Really, I mean it. I have read so many posts about guys who have issues with their girlfriends pasts, things that happened long before they even met. And these type of men highly annoy me. Also, your ex-boyfriend: GOOD RIDDANCE. Do not take him back, and never tolerate being treated that way again. Your ex was manipulative and may I add, an a-hole. A perfect a-hole. He does not get to robb you off your privacy because HE has some issues with what you did two years ago. Punching him what the best response Ive read, of all times. So many girls just sit there and take this behavior, let the guy treat them this way. What you did was GREAT. Maybe next time you meet an ass, not punch him, but just leave. But even so, your ex deserved that punch.
You will probably start to feel a lot better once you get him out of yoru system. Things are though right now, but believe me, it will get better. You already took a great step in the direction you need to go to better your life.
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A
male
reader, Thecutehelper  +, writes (5 April 2010):
Wow, he sounds like an arse. I may be a bit younger than you but this sort of thing happened to my sis. To be honest he sounds like he was hiding something big, and tring to constantely pass the blame. I feel sorry for you having to go as far as to punching him but he diservrd it defentely. Your ex had some serious trust issues, and I think the reason why when you were cring he started to laugh was cause he seems to me as a " hard man" , someone who pretends to be invunarble, he also seems to be extremely self-centred but I guess you know better to me. It's also easier to jugde situation after it happened than whilst it's happening. If you ask me you should have dumped him, so fast it would make his head spin.Anyway, good luck, ps. The reason for your depression is because I guess that whenever you comite yourself to a man he always seems to disappoint in some way, no offence if I was wrong.
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