A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been in a relationship for almost a year now and things are not good at it is when we first started.. I'm getting bored with our relationship..I'm working and my bf is studying. he doesn't want to get disturb during his review, so i don't call or txt him. when we have the chance to talk, we don't have a topic to discuss..we just end up hanging the phone..we just talk for about 5 mins a day and its killing me.. i don't see a happy relationship, a growing realtionship...i love him..and i want to be with him, but if this will be the set up then i thinki will just have to accept that we wont be together for the rest of our lives...what will i do?? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2011): I think he's just waiting for you to end the relationship because he's too passive to get up the nerve to do things the right way and tell you himself. I'd stop initiating anything and see what happens. I'll bet he just goes away.
A
male
reader, spinnaker  +, writes (16 May 2011):
 The relationship may have run its course - that is possible but it sounds more like you two are in a staring contest to find out who will incorporate a little excitment into this relationship.
If you do value this person in your life you need to be proactive at this point because there is no evidence that he is going to step up from what you said.
Read the news, or a magazine, if something interesting jumps out at you during the day bring it up to see if you can extend your 5 minute checking ins into something more stimulating. Lead off with something like, "you know I read an article that said (blah blah), what do you think of that?"
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A
female
reader, honestbear69 +, writes (16 May 2011):
Honestly, since I don't know the full situation. I am going to go on my past experiences. It sounds like you are both fully loaded with school work. I honestly, woudl try to suggest to him one night a week where you just hang out and forget about school and wrk and just relax. If he does not go for it then you may something to worry about. But, until then try the simple lets just have a date night type of thing. Just you ad me and no books.
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