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female
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*heila
writes: I have been with husband 11 years before I got married a year and half ago.He looks at porn on dvd that his friend gave him. He looks at porn mags. But he denies that he does. Says he has stop but still going on. He rec'd a text from a friend to go onto a welknown table dancing website. His friend said 'the girl' was on that site. His friend sent him footage via email of porn film footage recently that did remain unopened. I am furious that his friends think this is okay. He said he didn't know his friend had sent them and doesn't know what his friend is talking about. I told him I was angry that he allows his friend to think it is okay to do this and for him to allow his friend to send him stuff.His friend does not have a girlfriend and has problems getting one. I don't know how to deal with this all, being only married for over a year.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2005): You are so angry that your husbands friend who is single and doesn't have a clue thinks its ok to send your husband porn. Look at your reasons for being so objectionable to porn. Try discussing these with your husband. His friend may not know how you feel about it as men don't tend to tell their friends how there wife feels about stuff. Some wives are into porn. Don't embarass your husband by talking to his friend about it, he may never forgive you. If you react badly to porn your husband will deny he looks at it, there is no way of knowing for sure if he is looking at porn or not. I hated when I found out my husband looked at porn behind my back, I imagined that he liked the girls he looked at better than me. I told him so and we fought a lot about it. I told him that maybe if he looked at girls that reminded him of me then it might not hurt so much, we looked at porn together and we had a lot of fun, I found it quite a turn on when I let myself go.
A
female
reader, xxmeintrubzxx +, writes (23 August 2005):
Hi, his friend is probably jealous of your relationship as he cannot get one so he thinks he can destroy yours. Do something about it as it is your husbands fault aswell but do not let his friend know and pretend to him that you are okay with it so that he doesn't get the satisfaction of knowing that he is causing you to argue.
hope this has helped. xxx
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2005): You don't have to put up with it. Yes, our society today accepts a lot more then it did years ago but that doesn't make it right. If you are finding that porn offends you on a moral basis and you have told your husband this (about how much it affects you, that you find it degrading to yourself), then if he truly values, respects and loves you he will stop. If he doesn't then he is extremely selfish and obviously isn't giving you the respect you deserve. But I do have a q for you. You were with him for 11 years before marriage? And you never noticed that he watches porn?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2005): This isnt a big problem ALL men watch porn, there are many ways you can overcome this problem: by arranging a night in alone with your husband and watch it together you never know you might like it! if this doesnt appeal to you maybe you should give your husband some privacy and dont read his e-mails, what is it exactly that bothers you about him watching porn?
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