A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Im feeling really down lately. I cant put my finger on one reason for feeling like this, I think there are many factors. But the ones that get to me the most are that Im 29 in 2 months and still single. My age depresses me greatly. Im always looking at younger people and feeling slightly jealous or staring at peoples faces and wondering how old they are and whether they look their age. Weird I know. But for some reason Im obsessed. The fact that Im single doesnt really bother me too much as I have had alot of interest from guys but Im fussy and I wont settle with someone Im not 100% in to. I dont see the point. Having said that, all the guys I have been involved with have been total idiots who have hurt me, then I spend months getting over them and obsessing over them. Another thing that makes me feel low is how my friends seem to be drifting away. No matter how much I try to maintain contact with them, some of them are just too busy to see me. I know that sometimes this is normal in life but I just cant seem to move on from things. I try to be positive about stuff but its hard. Im always gloomy and sad. I just feel like there is something missing in my life and when I find it I will be completely happy. But I dont know what that thing is?? Would love to hear from you with some advice x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2012): It sounds to me like things have got a bit stagnant for you. When I was 27, I was in a similar position and I decided to meet new people. I joined a fencing group (and met a good friend there), I did a life drawing class and then I did a philosophy course (where I met my husband!). Go out and actively seek new experiences and they might just enrich your life!! Good luck xxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2012): I think any birthday milestone makes you reflect and compare yourself to others. As you get older you can look back and wish you had done something different or want the years back.
Fact is you can't go back. All you can do is look forward, make plans so your life is different. You are the only one that can make a difference,change things.
I remember my son when he was approaching 30, he was getting SO depressed his 20s were behind him.He soon snapped out of it though, too busy enjoying his life to worry.
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A
female
reader, Lucky786 +, writes (17 March 2012):
Don't look for your happiness in other people. They will only let you down and make you feel hopeless. Whether you're single or attached, your true happiness lies within yourself. The day you discover this to be true is the day you will be truly happy.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (17 March 2012):
There is not much difference between you and other attached people, or people who had played the field and are still single. Many are married but just stay together because of convenience and financial benefits. Disappointment is a part of life and the perfect relationship is idealized and you should never feel there is something wrong if that perfect relationship hasn't happened yet. You have high expectations and like many other people, haven't found the one yet. The thing that is missing from your life is someone who loves you unconditionally and would be there for you through thick and thin. Many people would settle for mediocre friendships which are all about fun, adventure and killing boredom. When your inner child has been hurt and you see the world as disenfranchised, it would be hard to open up again. Opening up would require you to be vulnerable of getting hurt but that is the only way to find your true love. The yearning of love and passion can drive people to do stupid things like looking for love in all the wrong places because we are so deprived of love already. The most important thing is self reliance and to realize that the happiness you seek is already within you, and that you can't depend so much on external factors and try to control things outside of you. It could be that you are feeling down because of hormones. If that is the case your body is dischargning negative energies. Maybe in a few days you would feel totally different.
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