A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyoneI feel a nervous wreck at the min and dont know what to do The tears are flowing as i type thisI am going out with a great guy He treats me so well I dont know if im imagining it but the last few dats he seems to type sweet words like babes and sexy in his texts less I feel insecure at the min that he is going off me I luv spending time with him so much it actually feels like my heart is breaking when i leave him I know he needs his own space and am trying hard to give him this but find it hard as all i wanna do is be with him I dont wanna push him away He says im not bugging him and he would say if i was but i dont seem to be able to take it in and seem to focus on whats worrying me I suffer with bad panick attacks and anxeity and dont know how to chill out Im going to counselling but dont find this helping Any ideas anyone
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2006): For goodness' sake, give YOURSELF some time away from him to do OTHER things you enjoy with OTHER friends/family, to say nothing of spending time enjoying your own company where you read a good book, go for a walk, museum, concert, movie, whatever else you like doing!
Ilikesummer is quite right when he tells you to show some independence and self-worth. Your bf told you you are not bugging him. I would add that you are not bugging him YET. Please, please, take a few steps back and stop worrying so much over small things.
The very worst thing you can do is to give him the impression of constantly questioning his feelings for you, and if you demand (even indirectly) "proof" that he does like you, it will become burdensome to him. You really must rein in your insecurities and recognize that he needs his space - AS DO YOU!! and that your happiness does NOT revolve around what he thinks does or does not, do.
Before you met him you were fine, right? Went on with your life?
Just keep in mind that even if this relationship ends - I hope it will not - that you would be upset and grieve for a while, but then hopefully would learn from the experience and have a better idea how to proceed next time, and keep your expectations under a little tighter control.
Finally, do whatever you need to do to relax and focus on other things. If you can do this he will see that he is not the be-all and end-all of your life and in turn will feel more positive even than he does now about the relationship. This is the best thing you can do if you want it to continue! But also, remember, you're doing it FOR YOU. You have to think of your own well-being!
A
male
reader, ilikesummer +, writes (20 December 2006):
you're freaking out because he types sweet words in text messages less lately? You seem very insecure & like you have to have constant re-approval that this guy is totally into you and nothing but you. Give him room, or you will lose him. Don't badger him, show some self- worth and independence...Guys like that. They don't like insecure, clingy girls that freak out about nothing. You're luck to have a guy that treats you so good. My b.f. doesn't even show me any affection until he's trying to get laid. Don't worry about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2006): heya... if you really like this guy and you are both happy then go for it.. you dont know how precious something is untill you have lost it. if he is happy with you then i shodnt worry. boys go through funny stages at times were you cant tell what they wont or their emotions, so this should be a fase. if he calls u babes n sexy then that is a good sign. i wodnt worry. i find that sometimes there isnt anything anybody can say to make you feel better about things. Time is a heeler and you just need to be happy and find you feet again. dont worry everyfin will work out.
hope i have helped x
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