A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my partner for 5 years now. We have had an ok relationship, it's had its good parts and its bad but we've usually battled on together. Recently i have come to realise that it is likely that I have depression. On top of this I feel like my boyfriend is taking me for granted. I don't feel special anymore, he doesn't treat me or do anything special. But when we talk about serious things he gets really cross at me as he becomes so defensive. So instead I just let everything eat me up inside. I don't know what to blame for feeling like this, the depression or my boyfriend. Please advise :(
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male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (24 October 2013):
It's probably both. Also, blaming him won't help you, it'll only make things worse. Take the initiative to improve things and reignite your "flame". I also suggest relationship counseling.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (24 October 2013):
 I think that some treatment for your depression is in order
both chemical and psychological... so a therapist and a doctor to prescribe meds sounds like a good starting point.
In addition, you and your bf have to TALK and if you find it hard to do without assistance then a bit of couples counseling on the side can't hurt.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 October 2013):
 Start by NOT trying to assign blame, but to be proactive. GO see your doctor, and get help with the depression part of it.
When someone is depressed they think it's just about them and their feelings, but it really isn't it has a really negative ripple effect throughout the people in your life. I know because I have been there myself.
Start by helping yourself and see what else it affects. Then if you start to get better yet STILL feel taken for granted, then deal with THAT issue.
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