A
female
age
26-29,
*snn123
writes:Sorry, lengthy.Recently, my best friend came out to me, and told me that she liked me. Now, that's great and all, but I've never seen myself being with another girl. This lead to me being very confused about who I was, and what I wanted, because I felt that little connection start to "come alive" inside of me.It's been about a month and half now, and we've just officiated our relationship. It's been kept a secret, and were both so okay with it. We haven't moved fast, but I can't even put into words how she makes me feel, and how much I want to be with her. We've said "I love you," and I truly believe that I do.Now, the only problem with all this? I am still VERY attracted to males, and the only female I am attracted to is her. Does this make me gay, bi. or what? I'm very unsure where my sexuality is at right now, but I can't see myself having a future with her. I just need advice on how to continue this, or what it means. Thank you!
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (9 August 2013):
 it makes you very normal. it's normal to wonder and question and experiment.
I consider myself bisexual but I'm currently in a monogamous marriage with a man and do not let others in male or female.
chigirl's response is perfect... read it and think that I wrote it. :-)
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (9 August 2013):
 It makes you YOU. Basically. You're a woman who likes men in general, but who also likes the occasional woman if anyone truly special comes along. Why the need to label it?
If anyone asks just say you are bisexual, it makes things easier. Being bisexual certainly doesn't imply that you HAVE to like ALL females as well as ALL males. Even hetero people are allowed to only like a selected few, even if they enjoy only one gender.
And don't forget about pansexuals, who are attracted to the PERSON regardless of the gender. You could be pansexual. Lately I've wondered if that is what I am, as the men I have dated have looked nothing alike one another, and in all cases I was drawn to their personality and not their looks. But then again I do enjoy the looks of women, just never had a relationship with one.
I call myself bisexual, but in reality we're all a bit bisexual and a bit of this and that and sexuality changes thorough your life. Right now you like this girl. In 20 years you might like something completely different, or you might still be with her. So don't worry about labeling yourself, just go with what you enjoy and be who you are. No need to put a label on it, it's YOU.
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A
female
reader, StephJayne  +, writes (9 August 2013):
 If you are both happy being together, then I'd say of course stay together. At the end of the day, if you're both happy that's all that matters.
You're still quite young, so of course you're going to be questioning your sexuality and not 100% sure what you want.
Just stay happy for the time being until you understand where to go.
Good Luck
SJ
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A
female
reader, nsnn123 +, writes (9 August 2013):
nsnn123 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you for your help! I'm currently 16, don't know why it says 13, but all the advice has helped a bunch! I appreciate everything!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2013): She's the first person who told you they liked you so of course you said yes , perhaps too quickly
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 August 2013):
 Honestly, given you age I won't even begin to guess about your sexuality. It's all still shiny and new and let's not forget all those hormones rushing about.
IF being with this girl makes YOU and HER happy then go for it. You might decide later on that you prefer one gender over the other. But give yourself some time, don't rush all these grown up stuff yet. Because with all that, comes a whole lot of baggage too.
Enjoy life.
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