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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: School starts up again soon and I was planning to try my best for A-level. I haven't been working for a while so I thought it would be easy to get back into it.The only thing is, last year my Dad continously blackmailed me with chucking me out of the school, and I thought this would end when I left a private school.But now hes saying that if I don't work how I want him to work, then he'll take me out to get a job. This is my life but I know he can do that.So what should I do? How he wants me to work is do more than what is asked, and what I'm asked is going to be essay after essay. I've tried talking to him but he doesn't listen to anyone. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk, thanks guys
A
male
reader, Joe158  +, writes (31 August 2008):
 yeah mate if your dad told you he had to sign a concent form to allow you to do you A-levels he's talking crap. Over16 education (Alevels and furhter stuff) is completely up to you, and only you make the decision. Not family members.
But if he's being abusive i do recommend you seek help and get him sorted out!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (30 August 2008):
If you are over 16 then your education is down to you. If you go to a local college they do not need your parents to sign anything.
Tell him that if you don't get to do your A-Levels then you are doing him for assault. If he can afford to send you to a private school then he can't afford to have it in the papers that he got arrested for beating up his daughter.
You have the power here.
Good Luck!! xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe does and she kinda stopped me from being chucked out at my old school half way through the course.
The only thing is he has to sign a conscent form to allow me to go, and he can apprantely just not sign it and I can't go.
He gets really violent easily, hes an abusive dad and I know he can get arrested for some of the things he does, but I'm concentrated more on just getting through my last years of enduring him...
And I don't think a family member would be able to take me in...
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A
male
reader, Joe158 +, writes (30 August 2008):
Hmm well to be frank your Dad is being an Ass. Although everybody does need to be pushed sometimes when motivation is low, it seems he is pushing you way too hard. Perhaps he is pushing you "because he doesn't want you to make the same mistakes as him"...don't worry everyone has parents like that or say something along those lines.
So my Advice to you. Firstly Relax about the situation. it says "age 26-29" above your statement so i'm guessing you are around 16-18 if you're doing A-levels (as i am myself) or you may be doing Older Education. If you are around 26 then you have no problem...just ignore your dad since you're an Adult, what's he going to do? lol
If you're younger as i am guessing you have to realise your Dad has NO CONTROL whatsoever over your Education and Work. It is all up to you. Ok of course he can move away but up until A-level it is against the law NOT to go to school. So your Dad couldn't blackmail you for chucking you out. When you hit Alevel it becomes optional so law doesn't come into it. But still...your Dad can't have you chucked out, and you can have the freedom to do whatever courses you want and can put it as much effort as you want to. Your Dad can;t force you to do things, this is YOUR life. and he has no authority to remove you from a job, it's impossible for him to get you fired.
If he does start being very mean i suggest you Either talk to your Mum if its possible, (apologies if not) or talk to a teacher. explain everything, they will be seriously nice don;t worry. I've talked to a teacher on a few very personal matters and although it seems hard at first, once you get talking it's such a relief. If it gets bad the teachers can help you in quite a lot of ways so don't worry about it.
Secondly say to your Dad to back up, tell him that he cant run your life for you, and you will do as you bloody well please :D
So a sum-up.
-You're Dad can't do anything to you. The Blackmailing is empty threats, that's all.
-TALK to a Teacher. They will help so much it's quite surprising.
-And remember, if it gets too much and you need serious help i suggest you either phone the police (if he becomes violent) or contact connexions (www.connexions-direct.com) who will help you in the best course of actions. They also have phone numbers to call on the site as well as email address.
I hope your Dad cools down soon
Joe
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (30 August 2008):
Can you move to a relative's house to go to a college near them?
Ask him straight out why he doesn't want you to do A-levels. Keep asking him until you get an answer. He can't ignore you forever.
Is your mum not involved? If not then involve her.
Good Luck!! xx
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