A
female
age
30-35,
*heSouthParkGirl
writes:I'm not really in this situation at present… still, is it normal for a non-ugly female person to be "friend zoned" by a guy they like? What might they reasons be for this?I only ask because I was reading a website (Urban Dictionary) and the majority of people seemed to concur that it was nearly always men being told by women that they considered them "just friends" and that if the situation did occur vice versa the women was "probably fat and ugly."Now, I don't like to generalise. Of course beauty is subjective. But I am a UK size 8 (i.e. not fat at all,) am reasonably “well endowed” and do take care of my appearance, so it seems sort of illogical that I am friend zoned with such extreme regularity. In fact I have never not been automatically friend zoned by someone I like. Perhaps I am just the equivalent of the male “geek” and for that reason no one likes me?To be honest I don’t know much about the world so am probably wrong but I just find it strange that I would get this from men in particular (in case you were wondering I have tried with women as well and also been automatically friend zoned) because aren’t men supposed to attracted to pretty much any okay-looking girl -biologically generalising of course- compared to women who have a more specific criteria when looking for a partner?(I don't wish to sound conceited. I'm mainly asking because of one particular person I like who has been repeated telling me we are "just friends" for a couple of years… however, now our relationship has "progressed" somewhat so I'm not entirely sure if we are just friends now. I was just thinking about it mainly hypothetically because of what I was reading.) Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2011): Ok maybe I should clarify my statements. My answer was that of possible reasons to a hypothetical question, not my personal opinion on women. If you like someone then you go for it, but to completely deny that people in your age range (yes you are still very young) don't have hangups on looks then you are fooling yourself. I don't personally agree with it or like it but it's true. I know, I was constantly friend zoned as well. Also there was no intent to make you feel bad about yourself, just to give you info. But, Angelic is more or less correct. It's about meeting the right guy. As far as you personally, it sounds as if you are doing just fine. Take care.
A
female
reader, TheSouthParkGirl +, writes (31 July 2011):
TheSouthParkGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the question Also, I don't actually want a relationship with anyone. Hypothetically, thinking about it, makes me feel slightly nauseous. I just like the guy I like, because, I like him and he is my best friend and I am attracted to him. I don't crave the idea of settling down and living happily-ever-after in itself, quite the opposite...
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A
female
reader, TheSouthParkGirl +, writes (31 July 2011):
TheSouthParkGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSorry for lack of clarity - "friend zoned" means being told by someone you like romantically and/or sexually they just consider you a friend, nothing more.I only like one guy, not multiple people. He isn't gay and hasn't been in a relationship for 6 months (nor was he in one when we met 3 years ago.) What is "playboy-looking?" I don't have a type. I'm usually more into cartoon characters – weird as that is. I like all sorts. When I described myself as "okay-looking" -if I did?- I was implying I was more on the upper-end of the scale, however, did not want to say this, for fear of sounding deluded in my arrogance, which of course, I now do. (:-D) I think the whole idea of a "league" thing is pretty stupid. Beauty is only skin-deep... clichéd as it is. The person I like is attractive, I think, but that's not why I like him. I like him because we get on well and have a lot in common and he is funny and intelligent.Also, I'm not at school or anything. I'm very nearly 18 and the guy I like is very nearly 19."If you like a guy and he only wants to be friends then he is either gay or in a relationship. If neither is true then there is something not appealing about the girl." – Wow - thanks so much for the reassurance!
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2011): Im not gonna lie. If you like a guy and he only wants to be friends then he is either gay or in a relationship. If niether is true then there is something not appealing about the girl. It's also possible you are shooting way out of your league. Even if you are nice looking, if the only guys you like are the playboy looking type of guys then you may be overstepping.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (31 July 2011):
 What does friend-zoned mean?
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