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anonymous
writes: I'm a female. I like a female college tutor. I'm 17 and shes 25. Is it ok? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (26 April 2005):
 Your tutor being the same sex is less of an issue than her being... your tutor. If you follow me.Whenever there's a student-teacher relationship, there's an imbalance of power, and it's not conducive to a good romantic relationship. You will usually end up stopping either the teaching/learning or the dating. Added to your confusion is an age difference that's pretty significant and the same-sex issue. That's got to complicate things.Ask yourself a couple of things: 1. Do you know how she feels about you? Are you just another student, or is it plain she's attracted to you too? 2. Do you have same-sex leanings generally, or is she the first? (Lots of young women fall for their mentors, male and female. It passes.) 3. Can you get another tutor who's as good at teaching as she is? 4. Are you willing to risk damaging your teacher-student relationship if this doesn't work out?Overall, trying to date a tutor/coach/mentor/teacher isn't a great idea. It's probably better to try to find another tutor that you're not attracted to, before you try to take anything further with her.Hope this helps.
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