A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am married to a man who is attracted to pear-shaped women. I am an apple-shape, and this has caused me to want to end the marriage. He always watches porn or looks at women that have a pear-shape. I can't change what i don't have. It has caused me to envy those women, which i never did until i met him. I tried to address this matter to him before. He just dismiss' the claim and says he very attracted me.but actions speak louder than words.
View related questions:
porn Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, cunnivorous  +, writes (15 August 2009):
You don't have to change anything about your body. pear-shaped women are born that way. love transcends physical preference. your hubby loves you despite . . . . you only have to be proud and contented with your "apple" type body. am here doing this comments because i love pear-shaped women so much myself. am a porn fan as well like your hubby but am still single. if your hubby likes to watch porn and admires pear-shaped women, it's not like it's a form of infidelity. you shouldn't be upset and thinking of a separation. it shouldn't be looked as the barometer of his love for you or the lack thereof.
A
female
reader, Olivia(Y).  +, writes (11 May 2009):
 You can't change what shape you are and you should love yourself the way you are because you were made that way which makes you beautiful.
You husband watchs porn, I think this is what the main problem is. Sit him down and calmly explain that this is knocking your self confidence because you find yourself wanting to be someone your not. If he doesn't cut down watching it, stop doing something he loves like sex or making his dinner.
Don't end you marrige for something like this. Your husband does love you and says he does find you attractive. Everyone envys people, I wish i was blonde, skinny and didn't have such pale skin but i can't change who i am and some people will find what i look like attractive and others won't. Everyone is different, i bet you are a beautiful lady, you just don't love yourself enough to realise how beautiful you really are.
Good luck
Livia
xoxox
...............................
A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (11 May 2009):
 Ok, all I hear is that he watches porn.... where every woman is going to be busty and tiny at the waist, and have crazy butts.... I don't think this means he cares for that shape as much as it means he cares for porn.
Look, without mass amounts of surgery, none of us are ever going to look like a porn star. I don't think the problem is your shape as much as it is him being a porn fan. And really, there's not a lot you can do to change that except ask him to cut back on the amount of porn he watches.
If it really bothers you, and he doesn't cut back on the porn out of respect for you, then I would suggest couples counseling. I doubt when he is watching porn, that he is thinking of fruit shapes. Guys just don't think about things like that. Regarding sex, they can be as simple as stimulus-response.
Bottom line, I think you created a different issue than is the real one at hand.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): Yes you`re right you cant change the way you are and just because he is attracted to these women doesnt mean he doesnt love you. He loves you therefore to him im sure it doesnt matter what you look like.Please dont end the marriage over this. I wish I was thinner and didnt have eczema all over me and Im sure my boyfriend would want that too but he doesnt say it because he says he doesnt mind and thinks im sexy anyway and loves me.Dont envy these women. you have a man who loves you and you love him. You need to get more confidence in yourself.
...............................
|
