A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been at university since september now and at first i really enjoyed it. I settled in suprisingly quickly, making 7 close friends and many others. My course interested me because it was new and i loved the city i'd moved to.I did however really miss my boyfriend and my family (especially my newborn nephew) but as i was only an hour and a half away from home i managed to get back about four times before xmas and my bf visited me too.just before xmas i started having doubts about my course, i do find it interesting, but ive now realised its not right for me, i dont want a career in this field and i feel like im wasting my time and money sticking it out for three years just because i wanted to be at uni.i told my parents how i felt and they wer very understanding, saying that i should do whatever makes me happy. the more i thought about it, i decided to finish this year (so that if i pass, at least i get a diploma and it wasnt such a waste of time and money) and then i could go home and work full time before travelling with my bf (something we both want to do)That was fine until i came back after xmas and now its not just my course i dont like... my friends seemt o have changed soooo much! im not sure if it because we feel comfortable around each other now that we're seeing peoples true colours, but 2 of the boys keep moaning about how borinbg we all are because we dont go out all the time (lack of money and lots of work is the reason!) another guy just stays in his room all the time and goes home every weekend, 3 of the girls also go home every weekend and there is really only one girl i am really close to and can talk to about all this.i keep crying because im just not enjoying anything at all anymore, i just want to be at home so much and this stress is making me miss my bf even more!i dont know what to do, i dont feel i can keep going until may because im just so unhappy. my parents say its fine for me to quit and come home now, but i feel like im letting them and myself down.im so miserable and cant decide whats best. please help...
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): I feel for you. I've been there before. I'd say finish the year, as that's what you said you wanted to do so that you won't have wasted your time. You also need to figure out why you're at college. Are you there for the friends? For the experience? For the credits? Once you figure that out you can figure out whether you should stay or go. I miss people from back home too. My closest friends where there and my family and my stability. Now I'm here and things were great at first but then I lost someone close to me and the semester has changed. I'm taking it as a challenge and finding the good in it all. Really it's going to get better, but sometimes I feel like going home, but I know home doesn't have the eduation I want and home would make me feel like I was giving up. Try to meet people with similar interests as you have and focuss on the good. Keep communication up with people from back home. Maybe the person who never comes out of the room feels similar to you. Sometiems people just need a little nudge. Hope this helps.
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