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I'm afraid that if my fiance takes a distant job we'll be isolated from family. He doesn't seem to understand!

Tagged as: Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 February 2006) 2 Answers - (Newest, 12 February 2006)
A female , anonymous writes:

Dear friends,

My fiance of 5yrs wants to up sticks - find a job in a distant town (which may, if he's offered it, take him further away from us (myself, and his 14 yr old son) if the company want him to stay out overnight or for several nights and possibly globetrot as well.

At the moment I can keep in touch with my retired mother by travelling to see her on the bus service, which takes me an hour. I will miss her very much if I have to move a great distance and am afraid in case she needs my help.

I have expressed this to my fiance and he seems to be short of patience and is displaying signs of being annoyed with me. It is not even that were we to move we would have his company each day - I feel that we would be isolated if he was asked to travel a lot, and that doesn't seem much of a relationship to me although he says he doesn't see a problem. Thankyou Faith

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A male reader, lovehurts +, writes (12 February 2006):

Hi there faith,

My advice would be to just tell him straight that you do not want to relocate somewhere far away from your mother at the end of the day faith your mother should always come 1st.If he really does love and care for you the way he claims to he will listen and come to a compromise.Also dont try and stop him doing this job as it will just make him even more determined to do it let him do what he feels best.Maybe it will be a good thing with him working away for days a time as it will give you a chance to have some time on your own and when he gets back you will both appreciate each other more anything

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A female reader, auntie claire +, writes (11 February 2006):

auntie claire agony auntDear "Faith", I can understand how you feel i would like to ask if you have ever thought of taking up driving lessons this will give you the freedom that you could go and see your mum whenever you like or if god forbid anything were to happen and she needed help i know you would like to be there for your mum but for your peace of mind is you were to go is there anyone else that could be there close by to lend a hand i'm not telling to to just leave at the drop of a hat at the end of the day he hasn't been offered this job yet but if it came to it would you want to go if you knew there was someone here to watch over things for you.

Or is this an excuse in your subconcious mind for not really wanting to go

think about all the pro's and con's of going and staying may-be you'll find your answer there

good luck in whatever you choose to do i hope it all works out for the best xxx

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