A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:First a little about me. I'm a male, 23 years old, about three friends, never had a girlfriend or sex, not even kissing.I am addicted to pornography.However, what's even more self-destructive is that I am addicted to PAYING for pornography. Watching average free streaming videos and images is not enough. I regularly pay for a months subscription to a site. Sometimes I have three subscriptions on the go at once. I always regret it afterwards, seeing it as a waste of money because of all the free porn that is available. I have had to cancel my debit card three times in the past because strange charges started appearing. (I assume people in the industry are selling info, it is an exploitive business).I am also well past vanilla porn because of how long I have been addicted. Started paying about 5 years ago, first saw porn when I was about 14. The kinkiness started around 15/16 years old. I need to see women tied up and being abused. Some women are into that I guess, but probably not most. I have been into shemale porn as well.Currently I am watching a lot of interracial porn. Black males/white females, and also humiliation porn where the woman talks down to the camera POV style.This style of porn damages my confidence because I am obsessed with not being good enough for a woman, hence needing to see them being taken by black men (I am NOT racsist by the way) and being cuckolded. I still like to see women being tied up/used for impersonal sex etc. I think women issues are at the core of this.Anyway, I have tried in the past to stop. I have used filter software, deleted all of my payed for and downloaded movies and pics. But I always come back and pay for more. I'm stuck. I want to have kinky/dirty sex with people, but deep down I know that all I want is a nice lovely girl to look after and love...I'm lonely.I'm shy and not very good with females. Whenever I have to talk to an attractive woman I just blush and lower my head when talking to them. I can't even look them in they eye when they are so beautiful, and thats not just because of my shameful addiction.A girl at work told me she didn't like me when she first met me because in her words, I was too weird and too quiet, whenever i did speak it was always about something she didn't know what i was talking about.Recently my confidence was shattered when I discovered I have a mild case of phimosis (tight foreskin), so I have been working on that. I have never worried about penis size or anything before, I thought I was lucky in that department until now.Any advice for kicking the porn? Sorry for the long post and the other details, I just wanted to tell you as much as possible so you might give good advice.Thank you.
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addicted to porn, at work, confidence, foreskin, girl at work, kissing, money, never had a girlfriend, penis size, porn, shemale, shy, transexual porn Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (22 April 2012):
 I seem to be handing out this link a lot lately, but here you go. This site is an excellent resource on the effects of porn addiction and help to quit. Good luck:
Www.yourbrainonporn.com
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2012): HelloMaybe you should get out more. Show some conviction and help yourself. Truth: you're just stuck in a virtual world. I know its really hard to talk to pretty women. A LOT of people feel that way. But you should start making efforts to force yourself and talk to pretty people. You dont need to hit on them, but just talk. Talk all the weirdness out of it. Its going to be hard, i agree, but whats the worst that can happen? Nothing really. Look, you have to show some conviction. I mean, solutions dont just pop out of nowhere. Be a little more determined. Its great that you have identified your problem, but you have to start working on it seriously. You feel this kind of comfort in the virtual world which is not so easily found in the real world...you have to work towards the comfort. Try being more confident. Be harsh on yourself as in, just STOP wasting your money and start working on talking to people who you think are pretty. Break the habitGoodluck.p.s: please dont get offended by the way i've answered the question. Maybe you need to be roughed up a little :)
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A
female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth  +, writes (2 April 2012):
 All right, but even then, see a counsellor and sort out your issues because I'm sure you realise you have some! Porn addiction is just as harmful as any other addiction, probably worse. It can only be a downward spiral for you if you don't take action NOW! And that tight foreskin issue can be resolved by circumcision. It's more common than you think.
All the best!
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A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (31 March 2012):
Get out an meet people.
If you can't tear yourself away from the computer, at least use it constructively - joining a dating website.
Or do stuff like speed dating.
If you want to stay lonely, keep on doing what you're doing - which seems to be heading far down a worrying spiral and more graphic and physical type of porn which is not acceptable.
Seeking help is something you should also consider.
As for tight foreskin, it's not uncommon, but it is the least of your worries right now.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSorry, I think I put some incorrect info in there. The porn I like never includes proper pain, I am NOT into all that stuff.
I don't like seeing anything more than spanking and slightly rough sex.
I don't like seeing people hurt and humiliated in real life, and I never will.
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A
female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth +, writes (31 March 2012):
You need psychiatric help, my friend. Anyone who gets a kick out of watching others being hurt or humiliated is long past the stage of being persuaded to quit. This abnormality can only be remedied by professional help. I'm glad you atleast realise how damaging this is, emotionally and socially (apart from financially). Get a GP to recommend a psychologist or psychiatrist for you.
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