A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I'm 20 years old and I had a baby seven months ago, and his father left 6 months ago after a four year relationship.I feel that I need to move on with my life and have recently met someone who I would like to get to know better and possibly have a relationship with.My problem is that I am really out of touch with dating! We met through a friend in a nightclub and kissed and exchanged numbers and have been sending text messages to each other.What I need to know is:- How often should I text him?- should I suggest meeting?- should I play it cool?Another problem is that I am unsure whether or not he knows I have a baby. Obvioulsy I would never try to hide this, but we have not discussed it, I assume that out mutual friend has told him but if he hasn't, how should I do it? And will it freak him out??I thank you in advance for your replies and for taking the time to read this.
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female
reader, starfairy +, writes (2 January 2008):
First of all, rule number one - DON'T play games, don't play it cool, or do the hot cold type stuff. It's always guaranteed to backfire.
Obviously don't text him every second of every day, but as often as he's texting you or texting back is fine.
Personally, I would suggest meeting up for a coffee. A nightclub isn't the best way to find a guy for a meaningful relationship as most people go out to pull for the night, but it sounds like he wants something more.
Mention to him that you have a child. You would be surprised at how many guys wouldn't bat an eyelid at that, my best friend had a baby at 18 (the father left her, too) and always used to agonise about telling a new boyfriend, but 99% of men are totally cool about it.
If he has a problem with it, you know he's definately not for you.
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