A
female
age
30-35,
*atz
writes:I'm a 15 year old girl and have a girlfriend of the same age, I'm soon to be 16 and I think she will want to have sex. Now I don't mind it, it's just, she has had past experience, and I haven't, so I wont really know what I'm doing and I would have to be kind of the 'leader'. Also, I'm insecure about my body. I really like this girl and want to stay with her, I really don't know what to do. I really need any kind of advice on what to do about this.
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female
reader, Princess_Rae +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Hatz,
I am impressed that you are very content with yourself to say that you have a girlfriend in an open forum at your age. When I was 15 I was certainly not as brave as you are. That said I am sure if you talk with your girlfriend you will find out her intentions. The one thing I have found with dating other women is that we tend to be be open to talking about things like that before hand. I am sure if you expressed your insecurities to her she would be understanding, and may even give you positive feedback.
I recommend before getting involved in sex with another girl, spend some time getting to know you likes and dislikes. Several weeks of self experiment and masturbation will allow yo a better understanding of how to go about having sex together.
Remember, even though you are having sex with another girl and the chance of pregnancy is zero, you still need to be careful and have protection against other things like STI. If you are both clean, which is more likely you should still remain careful as it is a sensitive area you are dealing with. Do not put anything in that you would hate for a doctor to have to remove.
The act of sex with another girl is a very instinct based thing, just do what feels right. I personally think there is no "leader" role when it comes to lesbian sex, only instances where you will be more in-charge of the activity then others. Have open communication with your partner during those times as only she will know what is turning her on or off.
Also do not do anything that make you or her uncomfortable, if you are both virgins and do not wish to loose that there will be plenty of time. The best advice I can give you is do not go into sex if you are uncomfortable, there is not undoing your first time and you want it to be fantastic. If you feel pressured, or not ready it will only make you regret it.
Finally I will close with imploring you to talk with your girlfriend. You will only know if you are both ready for this by talking it out. It is perfectly fine to wait if you both are not ready, or even if only one of you is ready. You should also talk to each other about your likes and dislikes so each of you have an idea of what to do beforehand.
I hope you stay brave and talk to your girlfriend about these things, and that when you do have sex it is fantastic for you and her.
Love,
Princess_Rae
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Why would you need to be the leader? Just go with the flow, start out kissing and hugging and just do what comes natural and feels comfortable, and always remember to use protection.
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