A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am 86 years of age and desperately in love with a lady of 50. She attended a college for the disabled in her youth and made a large circle of friends there who still meet regularly for a social get together. One member of this group is a male with whom my lady had an intimate relationship which ended about 4 years ago. My lady still attends these meetings, although her former lover is also there and I find this very difficult to cope with. Rightly or wrongly I think it is wrong for her to keep meeting a former lover like this and think of it as a threat to our very lovely relationship. I would greatly appreciate your advice on this matter. Sincerely yours. RonShe assures me that they are only friends now and I do believe her because she has never lied to me yet.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (19 February 2007):
 I agree with the aunt below, why not go with her to the next get-together? That way you can see what goes on and meet some of her friends as well. I'm sure you will be pleased to find out you have nothing to worry about. Have fun!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2007): As I am just 31, and wonder sometimes where all the passion has gone, You've given me great comfort to know that love and passion can still be as strong when you're 86!
If your lady's old relationship was over 4 years ago, and if she has never lied to you, it doesn't sound like you have any reason to be suspicious. It is normal to be a bit jealous I suppose but try not to let it get to you.
Can you go to the groups with her? If you could check out how she interacts with this guy, and see that it is nothing, maybe it would reassure you?
good luck
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