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male
,
anonymous
writes: This is an extremely embarrassing thing to admit but at 34 years old, I have never had full sex. I have only once had a sexual partner, about 4 years ago and had severe problems in the bedroom department. She wouldn’t go all the way with me as she said that ‘I wasn’t ready’. Potential partners have come and gone, each and every time because I was too timid to admit that I liked them and ask them out. A fear of rejection hounds me and I’m beginning to feel as though I may never meet anyone. The trouble is, I fear that if I meet someone and admit this to them, they will run a mile. I’m not just after sex and want a loving relationship. Please help me. I just don’t know what to do any more.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2005): Youre a decent guy most your age would turn onto underage girls to gain experience if they were in same boat as you.
A
female
reader, mystic-max +, writes (4 November 2005):
FIRST THING IS FIRST, MOST WOMEN WOULD BE PROUD TO MEET A MAN LIKE YOU IT AT LEAST THEY CAN BE SURE YOU HAVE NO STD'S!
DONT KEEP TRYING TO FIND MISS RIGHT. THERE IS NO SUCH THING, MISS RIGHT IS ANY WOMEN THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY AT THE END OF THE DAY AND VICE VERSA. REMEMBER THAT THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE WORSER OF THAN YOUR SELF. YOU WONT BE THE FIRST PERSON TO FEEL LIKE THIS OR THE LAST. HAVE YOU TRIED DATING AGENCIES OR EVEN THE GYM, YOU WOULD BE SURPRISED THE AMOUNT OF SELF CONFIDENCE IT CAN GIVE YOU. WHEN YOU DO MEET A WOMAN AND YOU ARE COMFORTABLE WITH HER, AM SURE YOU WILL ACHIVE YOUR GOAL, JUST REMEMBER TO RELAX AND ENJOY THE MOMENT AND EXPERIENCE. GOOD LUCK
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2005): Mate, Welcome to my world!! I was in the same boat as you, and the important thing is not to see it as a failing. Sleeping around is nothing more than an ego boost to people with low self esteem, I went so long without sex because I didnt feel comfortable with whoever it was I could have slept with.
When the time comes to meet someone, she'll be exactly what you want her to be, understanding and a great lover. Dont sweat it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2005): Go to a professional.She will teach you what you need to know and that will give you experience,so you are not " ashamed " of being a virgin,when you meet the right girl.Anyway,for a guy, it is so much easier, there is no physical evidence that you are a virgin. I had a boyfriend who was a virgin, and to tell you the truth, I couldn't tell.If he hadn't told me I wouldn't have known.
The most important thing is to see sex as something good and healthy and not as something dirty and shameful.There are plenty of people who start later than others, which doesn't meet there are worse than others.Sexuality is not a race. You can start enjoying it at any age.
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