A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 30 years old and I have never been kissed or been on a date. I feel deeply embarrassed and ashamed because of that. People my age have families and here I am, wondering what kissing feels like, like a 13 year old child. My question is, should an opportunity arise... I don't know if I should tell the guy the truth or just go for it and hope he won't notice I don't know how to kiss? I don't have a problem telling him I've never kissed anyone, but that admission automatically translates into "I'm a virgin" and that is something I am not comfortable sharing at that stage of a potential relationship. I would appreciate your advice. Thank you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2015): are you saying you are a woman who has never had a boyfriend before at age 30? i'm a guy who is 27 and never had a girlfriend, I find this shocking because it's usually guys that are more prone to being single this long than the other way around
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2015): hi there, i also dont think you should worry about to much either. I'm 25 and i dont remember what kissing feels like since i've been single for a long time. you'll find out what feeling is like someday.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2015): I had my first kiss at 31. Never bothered me.I dated him for almost 5 months and then kissed him when I was sure that's what I wanted to do. I told him several months later that he was my first kiss; he was very surprised and couldn't tell. Take life at your pace and do what you're comfortable with, in your time frame.
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male
reader, Too_Trusting  +, writes (22 July 2015):
Do not worry about it. Please, do not feel ashamed. Everyone experiences life at a different pace. Everyone kisses differently. So, on your first kiss, maybe things don't feel quite right. No problem. You could have kissed a bunch of people before, but because this is someone different, the kiss is different. The person you're kissing may feel like the awkward one. You will adjust, as will he. Before you know it, the kiss between the two of you will feel as natural as breathing. Don't worry, you'll do fine. Kissing, affection and lovemaking all come surprising very natural, once you start to explore them. You'll be fine. Relax and enjoy the ride.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2015): OP here, thank you everyone who answered, I really appreciate it. A special thanks to Devont, who made some really good, eye-opening points. Telling the guy would put a lot of pressure on him, that never occurred to me.
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male
reader, devont  +, writes (21 July 2015):
 Firstly, please don't fret or worry about this. It's nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. Everyone has different experiences at different ages, there's an average age, but not a normal or right age, to do anything. Personally... I don't think you need to bring it up. If you feel comfortable and you want to, then go for it, but I don't see any reason to mention it really. A guy that really likes you won't mind either way, but if you do bring it up, then that puts quite a bit of pressure on him. And when is the right time to mention it anyway? Right at the very start of seeing someone? Too much information. Just before a kiss? It could ruin the moment. After a kiss? Well you've kissed someone now, so what does it matter?! I wouldn't mention the kissing at all, but I would maybe bring up being a virgin later on in the relationship. You say you don't know how to kiss... Neither do a lot of people that have had a lot of kisses, so I really wouldn't worry about that! I would be extremely surprised if a guy noticed. When you are with someone you like and the opportunity arises for a kiss, just go for it, don't worry about if it's right or wrong or left or right or whatever. Just relax and take it slowly.Enjoy yourself and look forward to meeting the right guy.
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female
reader, MSA +, writes (20 July 2015):
 In this day and age, most have already had their first sexual experience by the age of 18. My boyfriend told me that guys see it as being very very lucky to be able to find a girlfriend who is still a virgin at the age of 20.
Don't take it as a negative thing.. one day, that right guy will come along and feel so lucky to have you.
Love will find you when you least expect it.
Good luck!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2015): Awww - that's sweet - & any bloke who really likes you will not mind at all!
Not everyone is getting off with blokes all the time & making themselves available to them - maybe you are just waiting for the right one!
If it makes you feel better - I didn't lose my virginity until I was 30 & looking back I really regret I lost it too, with the man I chose - so I even think I was pressured into it at that late stage!!
Don't worry - he would rather you have never kissed at all rather than snogged 100 different random blokes!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2015): Hi, dont worry about it too much. If or when that first kiss is initiated, and you dont know what to do, just mimic what the other person is doing
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