A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Im 19 and shes 15... Thats my main concern, if it were 26 and 22 the idea wouldn't be that big a deal. Its just that our age group is a bit more sensitive. There is nothing going on yet, but we are both sending signals to each other and its pretty obvious to us both that sooner or later one of us is gona speak his mind. I feel hesitated because i know im older than her and that she may not be mature enough to understand the problems that might arise. The next surprise is that she is a 2nd cousin :sI tried not to think of her but i cant help it, we were on a weekend trip together with family and we spent the whole time together, we knew each other before that but we got really close during that trip. To a point that i can't stop thinking about her... we text each other all the time, and everytime i feel like im doing something wrong in my eyes i see it as taking advantage of a girl thats younger than me, but her actions and behaviour indicate nothing of that sort. I honestly don't know where something like this could go, and i dont intend to take advantage of her in anyway possible.. i just want to know what people think of this? am i doing something wrong? i mean she could be as old as my little sister :sEven if we continued and got into a relationship, won't it be weird? there will be things that i can do she cant.. and vice versa.I dont think i have the patience to wait more than a year besides i still dont know what she thinks about any of this.. i just couldn't get this out my head and so i needed help.Thanks to whomever reply in advance :)
View related questions:
cousin, text Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2010): No offense, but what do you see in a 15 year old?
I know sometimes you can't help who you like, but you're 19. There are plenty of other women around your age and probably more mature.
It's not so much that she's your second cousin. I could care less about that, but the age is the conflict as you already know.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2010): Well I see nothing wrong in you having a relationship with her, providing that nothing more then kissing takes place until she is legal. Love is blind we can't help who we fall for. Maybe you should talk to your parents and see what they say and how they would feel about it.
...............................
A
male
reader, Myau +, writes (7 April 2010):
How close is your family? Do your parents know hers?
If yes then its a can of worms and you should leave it for now. If you break up you whole family will side with her
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2010): Even if she behaves very maturely, she is still 15. You are right that this age bracket is very sensitive, and there is good reason for it. Are you the same person that you were at 15? In the teen years people grow and change really quickly. 19 and 15 are only four years apart, but lightyears apart emotionally.
Also, she is your cousin. While second cousins are not technically considered incest because the DNA is different enough that birth defects are highly unlikely, socially it is pretty much unaccepted. I see that your family is close enough to have get-togethers, so they will all be involved in any relationship you and her form. Imagine how your family will react to the age and relation. I would venture to say that they will not approve, and while you may be ready for the heat, at 15 I really doubt she is.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (7 April 2010):
She is too young to get involved with love. You should build your career first and think of love later.
...............................
A
male
reader, Wayne0 +, writes (7 April 2010):
Bro thats just nature but then two things here involved. First she's your cousin and boy thats wrong.second is the age factor may if she was a bit older the cousin thing could have been ignored..if she shows signs like that when she's 17 and above then hey its party time but now hands off
...............................
|