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female
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anonymous
writes: Me(16) and my boyfriend (20) of 1.5 years has had sex for 3 times already, we are in a very loving relationship,but I fear that if we start having sex alot the relationship will be more based on that than on love.And I fear losing him. Am I just being stupid? Or is there something we can do to keep loving eachother just as much? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, xNatx +, writes (31 December 2006):
 Hi, sex in a relationship is a god thing but maybe not all the time like you say. What ever you both feel comfortable with once a week, twice a week whatever makes you feel happy, i dont think sex could ruin the relationship and i dont think you would loose him over sex either but if you are having worries talk to him and ask what he thinks is too much or too little sex and if one day either you or him dont feel like it you must tell each other because that is when things could start to go wrong. In a relationship you should always have communication always talk about your feelings and worries and hopefully you can sort something out together. hope this helps.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2006): In an true love relationship, physical intimacy and making love is a very healthy and giving embodiment/expression of a couple's bond and heartfelt feelings. But with that expression of love comes a mutual respect, trust, comfort, safety and a solid devotion for each other. There is never fear. Fear has no place in a loving relationship. But you express fears. you fear losing him-you fear having sex with him will not be an expression of love. You fear all he will want is the sex. Most young men do like the sex part, but they are capable of loving their gf's, as well. Then why don't you feel comfortable/safe with with him? Does he respect and honor you? Do you trust each other? Is he returning your feelings? Is he not loving you back, if you are feeling so much uncertainty. If so, I think you should re-evaluate this whole relationship. A real Love shouldn't cause the fearful feelings you are feeling. Just something to think about, dear. Take care
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