A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 16 and there is a girl who is 13 who really, and I mean really! likes me. I know her best friend and she has explained how much this girl likes me. I know she is only 13 but appears very mature for her age. To begin with I liked her just as a friend but recently I have begun to like her more and more. To add to this I am 'mates' with her brother who is my age. Basically I am wondering if the age gap is too big and what I should do next.thank you very much
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2009): good on you and enjoy yourself x
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOK im now going out with her, we are both going to take it VERY VERY slowly and it is going to be a secret relationship.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2009): no its not to big... at all. go for it. i mean i know people who are like 10 years apart! 3 years is nothing. i say, GO FOR IT :D
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your advice guys, you have been great !
I think im gonna keep things the same right now and take it very slowly :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): who cares about the law it is your body and you can do what you want with it it should be your own right.and technically who cares about the age gap.its a stupid number just go for it!
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female
reader, ladydela  +, writes (24 June 2009):
 there is nothing wrong with you dating her an liking her but dont say anything that you wouldnt say to a 13 year old she is still a blank canvas and can be dyed any color
what i am saying is dont say things to mature and also dont have sex with her that is considered statuory rape
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): hey dude,, i say go for it, if the girl is mature enough im sure you will be very happy together, just make sure her brother dosent find out until it gets a bit more serious otherwise he might become a bit unhappy with the situation and blame it all on you. i was in the same position as the girl and me n my boyfriend, who is 17 and i am 14, are really happy together. good luck!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2009): I guess there is nothing wrong with it...but people might frown upon it because you are both at different stages in life..you are half way through Secondary School and she has probably just started...but the choice is yours...:)
Good luck
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female
reader, Olivia(Y). +, writes (18 June 2009):
 You can date this girl but the law states if you touch her you can have charges pressed against you.
Even with consent if you do anything with a person 13 and under it is classed as rape.
I know where you are comming from though. I remember when i was 14 and my boyfriend was 17 and we didn't really care what the law said we just wanted to be together.
I would stay friends with her though for the moment, She could say anything and they will take her word for it and you could end up with a prison sentance and your name on the sex offenders list which will mean you will have to be checked regulary if you have kids and you will find it extremaly hard to get a job.
Livia
xoxox
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2009): hey man, im 14 and i say the gap isnt to big, go for it, just dont get the sudden urge to rape, legally speaking, a 13 year old, if she is willing, its still rape at this age...if you can handle it go for it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2009): If you're mates with her brother, that's a no-go area!
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male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (18 June 2009):
 Well if you can keep your dick in your pants for 3 years, go for it! But I think if you are 16 and not have sexual urges when you are with the girl of your dreams, there maybe something wrong with you.
Just my opinion.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2009): 3 years at teenage years is HUGE. Army medic right, three years down the line when she's 16, there be no problem. But at the moment you are at such diffrent levels, emotionally and physically. Leave this young girl alone and find a girl in your age range. I'm sure you know this is wrong, I remember being 16
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male
reader, Ricky1989 +, writes (18 June 2009):
this is such a tricky one. if you were 21 and she was 18 i would say there was no problem what so ever but because of legal circumstances and the fact the both boys and girls develope alot both mentally and physically during their early-mid teens i would have to say that YES, THE AGE GAP IS TOO BIG in this circumstance. sorry :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCheers guys some great advice ! (especially 'uh oh') you seemed to hit the nail on the head when you said I was unsure. As for what 'army medic'says, i would be perfectly happy not 'doing anything' with her.
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male
reader, uh oh +, writes (18 June 2009):
Hey dude, I'm 15 so i'd like to think i know where your coming from.Firstly, i think the most important person is yourself. You know what she wants. So you need to figure out EXACTLY what you want. The only way to do this is to understand your own feelings. You haven't said much but it seems like your feelings are pretty unclear to decifer at the moment, So i think you need to let them develop and wait, because the last thing you want to be doing is rushing into a relationship with her in the heat of the moment.As for her brother, when you say "mate" - do mean your not actually friends with him, but just know each other?If so, you shouldnt let him bother you too much.Once you work out what your feelings are telling you, you should talk to her in private. Just mull things over, tell her what the deal is, ask her if she still feels the same way, and then take it from there.If you do decide that you want to be with her, i think you can expect the whole "protective brother" act to come through from her bro. But dont let this put you off. She wants to be with you, you want to be with her - and thats all that matters if thats the case.As for her being 3 years younger, i suppose at this age, age does sort of matter because 3 years is still a long time for a teenager especially if your in an open relationship, it may be difficult to live with your friends who MIGHT take the michael and tease you. I would recommend a secretive relationship just until the point where you think age really doesnt matter, because a lot of it has to do with your own personal security about the situation. Living in a secret relationship doesnt have to be a chore, it can be exciting and fun, and it all it means is that you act asa friend with people around and like a true boyfriend when your alone with each other.But is urgently stress you work out your feelings and then talk it out with her before rushing into anything you may want to walk back on.Hope i helped - and keep me updated on your situation and hope verything works out for you!Peace
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reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (18 June 2009):
She could be as good looking and mature as a 20 year old, but unfortunately she is legally too young for you! If you did anything with this girl (and lets face it your 16 so you are going to want to) you could get arrested for rape.
Does this girl have an older brother? What would he say to his little sis dating a 16 year old? Give it 3 years and it would be fine for a 19 year old to date a 16 year old but at the moment you are a MAN and she is a CHILD! During the first half of your teenage years you go through a lot of emotional changes and pressures and if you date this girl you will be messing with her head and could get her into trouble with her parents.
Also what would your mates and parents say? I do understand that she may seem to be as mature as you, but that is a front and she really isn't. Stay friends with her and on her 16th Birthday ask her out!
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