A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met my boyfriend on the internet.At first given the distance between us, we both felt it was a good idea to just stay friends.He told me about his ex, who he refers to as psycho. Recently we've been getting in a lot of fights, mostly due to my insecurities. One side of my head says he's a great guy, the other says he's a slimeball.He told me his ex contacted him once again and stated she wanted to get back together with him.He told me he said no to her, yet instead of just ignoring her, he chose to respond. Why is that?I told him how much that is bothering me, and he asked me for a reason. He asked if I was jealous, in which i said I was.He said he would ignore her to make me happy.I want to know, why didnt he just ignore her in the first place? I know he is bitter, he dumped her, yet he said he feels "indifferent" when she contacts him.Is it some sort of ego booster for him?He tells me he no longer has feelings for her, so its not because he wants to get back together, or at least I hope.
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female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (6 June 2010):
 Yes, it's a big ego boost. You don't say if you are still in a long distance relationship with him, if so he's probably keeping his "options open" and he's probably talking to more women than just her. However if you are now living in the same location, it could just be the ex and the ego-thing that he's attracted to. Men have this primal need to feel "desired" by other women. The problem is, when things go in a certain direction, they typically don't always say "No" and this is what gets them into trouble. You've told him to stop, so hopefully he will.
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