A
female
age
36-40,
*aBelle
writes:I like my good friend Sarahs brother Jack. Last week sarah invited me to a family party. Her brother and his friend were there and we all had a great time, me and Jack took tons of pics together. We were all drunken and ended up back at Jacks. His friend and Sarah went to bed and we stayed up talking and laughing, listening to music. We ended up cuddling on the sofa then kissing, he was affectionate and stroked my arms and back. Then we fell asleep together. (the time i had met him before i ended up with my head on his lap and him stroking my hair and arm.)It was realy nice. Hours later I shivered as i was cold so he insisted i slip into bed with his sister. Sarah and i ended up going home without me getting to speak to him. I spoke to sarah about it and she wasnt too impressed about it but then seemed fine. its been a week so i got enough courage to ask Sarah if her brother was interested or not. she said they hadnt spoke about it and they werent 'that' close. He hasnt contacted me so should i assume he is not interested? Why did he behave that way then?could he like me?I did ask him while were cuddling if he actualy liked me or was he just kissing me as he was drunk and he said he did like me...but we were drunk so i dont think it counts...?Also i gave him options to leave, i said he could leave and join his friend if he wanted and he declined both times even laughing like i was silly to suggest it.I added him to my social networking site..is that weird? i dont want to be a bunny boiler...i added his friend who is my friend too... can i ask him out and how?am i kidding myself? If he liked me he would find a way to contact me even if he doesnt have my number..right?Sorry its so long!
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female
reader, MaBelle +, writes (1 February 2009):
MaBelle is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for your feedback...I may just have to chalk this one up to experience, ah wish things could just be simple ie. boy kisses you = boy likes you.I know he doesnt have a girlfriend as i asked him as i didnt want to be kissing him if he had a girlfriend, in fact i asked him twice as the second time he laughed cheekily and said you already asked me that.I guess i wish that he did like me as hes the most gentlemen like guy iv met in such a long time and that its the second time we have had a little closeness. ah well im sure there will be more from where he came from...i hope anyways..im not ruling him out just not getting my hopes up.Would it be terrible to talk to him over the social networking site? or is that too much?Thanks again guys!xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2009): Hmmm....tough call on this one. Hard to tell what guys are thinking sometimes!
Since I don't know *how drunk* he was at the time, I can't say if he had his faculties straight enough to make good decisions. Sometimes guys will try to score with the nearest available girl when they are drunk, whether they really like her or not, then they forget or can't even remember what they did the next day!
But in this case, I'd have to guess that he was'nt all that drunk or else he probably would have tried to take advantage of the situation. The fact that he didn't do that tells me that he was sober enough to be in control of himself and also shows that he has respect for you.
Maybe he was just enjoying your company and the closeness, but not intending to take things further because he's interested in someone else? Do you know if he has a girlfriend or is dating anyone?
Or maybe he really IS interested in you and is just being a gentleman. Taking things slow.
It does speak well of him that he didn't try to push things further than kissing and caressing you. When you got sleepy, he insisted you go sleep in the other room with his sister and didn't try to get you into his bed. I think that is a really, really positive sign.
It sounds to me like he might be a bit shy, too. Since you are both young, it's possible he's never had a serious girlfriend before and doesn't really know what to do. He might be afraid to approach you for a date, although you've certainly given him every indication that you like him (without being too obvious!! lol), so he doesn't need to worry that you'd reject him if he asked you out.
A subtle way to let him know you'd like to go out might be to drop a few hints with his sister or mutual friends and have them encourage him to ask for your number. Or if you see him fairly often, just make a point to always be welcoming and friendly (not stalkerish, just nice), give him lots of smiles and talk to him. He should eventually pick up on your signals and summon the courage to ask you out on a date.
Or you could just try the more direct approach if you're feeling bold: tell him you'd like to get to know him better, invite him to hang out sometime, and slip him your phone number! If he calls, you'll know he likes you. If he doesn't, well, it might sting a bit, but at least you will know for sure.
Hope this helps!
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