A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I have been talking to this boy for 3 years on and off and in the mean time we have both had partners. We first started talking at the start of college and it's normal for us to talk all day, everyday. I have met him twice and kissed him both times, however, he had a girlfriend at one of the times. He always tells me he wants to see me and makes sexual innuendos towards me which I think he is joking. I care about him a lot and do like him but it hasn't moved anywhere and he currently has a girlfriend but still asks to see me? It's so weird if I don't talk to him all day, his became part of my life. His always there when I need him and I'm always there when he needs me. I just don't know where to go from here. I'm confused? Should I give up?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2016): The question you should be asking is "if he has a girlfriend, why am I still hanging around him?" Then stop talking to him completely.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2016): The question you should be asking is "if he has a girlfriend, why am I still hanging around him?" Then stop talking to him completely.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (15 June 2016):
 It is hard to cut contact, but you need to. You're talking to a cheater. You know it's wrong and it says a lot about you if you keep going back - you *can* stop yourself, but you *choose* not to. Don't be that person.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 June 2016):
 Yes it may be difficult as you have spoke to him for three years, but he has a girlfriend and he has used you going to uni as a reason why you both cannot be together. The thing is if he really liked you he would do anything to be with you, even if that meant doing long distance for a while. Sorry but this guy is just not in to you at all. He likes having a back up. Go travel the world and meet new people and try and forget about him, he is not a friend he is someone who enjoys the attention from you, and uses sex innuendo to boost his ego.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (15 June 2016):
 Remember this important adage:
"A guy can NEVER have too many girls available to put out for him..."
NOW, does it make sense?????
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2016): I did not know he had a girlfriend to a few weeks later. I can understand how it looks that he is stringing me along but I know he does care about me but it's hard to work for us as I'm always travelling and go to uni 4 hours away from home which he states that's the reason why we can't work.I understand it's unfair on his girlfriend and I have tried multiple times to break away but I always end up coming back. You can understand how hard it is breaking away from someone I have spoke to everyday for 3 years. I can't help but feel things would be very different if I was close to home?Thanks for all your answers, I sometimes feel like I deserve better as he does go mad if I tell him I'm talking to a boy or even post a cleavage selfie. The control isn't right as we're not in a relationship. I appreciate everything you guys have said and will try and cut the talking as much as I can and enjoy travelling the world!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2016): He is not serious about you.
He would just like to have you on reserve in case he is in the mood for sex or is in between girlfriends.
Sorry.
When a guy is serious, his actions are consistent. They are not unpredictable, all over the place, here or there and have you guessing all of the time.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (15 June 2016):
Did you know he had a girlfriend when you kissed him? If so, that was unfair of you.
Look, I know what it's like to get attached to someone and talk all the time, but he's effectively cheating on his girlfriend and you shouldn't be a part of that. It's really difficult to break it off, but you need to; you don't need him and he certainly doesn't treat you or his girlfriend the way he should be.
Please cut contact or at least massively decrease it and don't talk to him often any more. It's important that you start to see your self-worth separately from this guy and get a new hobby or new friends to move on with your life. Don't fall back into his clutches. Find someone who's available.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (15 June 2016):
 Yes give it up. He has you on a string. You don't seem to be getting much out of it. If it's commitment you want then you aren't getting it from him are you.
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