A
female
age
30-35,
*eila1990
writes: I broke up with my ex fiance because he has anger problem,he cuss on mevery much when we dispute and he get overly jealous over stupid things. We back together few days ago and he start going to a therapist because he know he has a problem. Last night, we added each other back on facebook , he told me,"Everyone doesn't know yet that we back together so you should not write anything sweet on his wall like ( I love u hun , I miss u ....) ".I didn't like what he said to me coz we tell each other on the phone sweet words. However, I should not write " I love u" on his wall becoz he is worried about what his mother and people think. Can you please give me some advises ?Thank you
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broke up, facebook, fiance, jealous, my ex Reply to this Question Share |
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male
reader, Hennessy1989 +, writes (17 August 2012):
I've been with my girlfriend for 3 years and I move her, I hate when she writes it on my facebook, I told her not to do it anymore, a relationship should be between 2 people, not the whole world
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2012): I've got to agree with the anon female poster below. Facebook is perhaps the worst venue to express your romantic life ...and your boyfriend might just be of this mind. Telling the general public that you love so and so or "shouting it from the rooftops" doesn't prove the sentiment's sincerity...personally I think it cheapens it by how indirect and potentially melodramatic those sorts of posts can be.
It also makes a person wonder who the intended audience is; would it be your boyfriend or any potential romantic competitors? In that way it might make you appear insecure. But perhaps I'm old fashioned.
All that said it sounds like your boyfriend likely has people who don't approve of his relationship with you and he'd rather not invite their questions or criticisms (one of the very reasons I leave my romantic life unplugged) He also is seeking help for his anger with counseling which might indicate he wants a little down time and introspection.
He's got problems for sure...but if they haven't included cheating and you want to stay with him and help him through this, you might try foregoing your desire to post your affection online...there are plenty of other ways to show it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2012): Why do you even want your private life to become known to everyone.
To say it on a phone its one thing, but to put it online for everyone to see, it's another. Why people even making Facebook a sours of communicating with someone you see regularly. Facebook is for those who you don't see and just want to keep in touch.
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (17 August 2012):
hmmmm interesting... i dont think this guy is all that into you.. i hate when my GF says she loves me blah blah blah because guess what i dont love her.
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A
male
reader, Taurean +, writes (17 August 2012):
There is nothing wrong in what you did.
You simply need to determine why does your fiancee reacted in that manner.
1.) He could just simply be wanting to do things at his own phase/time and by you posting something on his fb wall resulted in you kinda stepping on his toes.
2.) He might have told some "friends" things that are not positive against you or your relationship that will make him look stupid if it is known that you are back together again.
3.) Or it might just be one of those awkward moment that sometimes happen to couples who are not open to each other about their feelings.
My advice is to simply ask him (at the right moment) why he didnt like what you posted on his fb. If he still has unresolved issues about it im sure he will react in a manner that will explain your question, otherwise he will simply tell you why or maybe he will apologise to show that he really love you. Afterall, being "fiancee" is preparation to a lifelong commitment of love, care & respect. The key is HONESTY to each other.
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