A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:hi if a teenager is in a proper relationship, how far into the relationship do you think the average teenager has sex?My 16 year old daughter and her 16 year old boyfriend have been together for about 3 months and they are both pretty serious about one an other. I'm wondering how far in sexual terms they have gone.Is there any way of telling without asking her? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2007): this will prob make u feel tons better. i aint a slut n i have only slept with one lad i did this wen i was 15 we had been together 2 month but were in love and serious bout each otha we been together 16month now n we still in love. i told my mam cos i wanted contraception hopefully ur daughter can do this too. hope this helped :) xxx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2007): me and my girlfriend got together when we were 16 also and we waited till we had been together around 9 months before we had sex. many teenages find that if the relationship is going well and feels 'serious' their happy to just kiss etc for the first few months. my parents never found out we were having sex however my gf's mum new when we were planning to have sex and even put her on the pill. i no my girlfriend was greatfull for her mothers openness and support so i would encourage a similar relationship with your daughter if you want to know about and help her with her sex life.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2007): There's no way you could actually tell by her facial expression that she's actually had sex. The only ways you could actually tell that she has slept with her boyfriend are:-
-Finding a condom in the house in which you haven't used (or any other of your children if you have anymore)
-Finding a pregnancy test
-Your daughter being pregnant
-Having your daughter's boyfriend's parents say that they found a condom in the bathroom or in their son's (your daughter's boyfriend) room
Other than that there aren't many other ways that you could tell without asking her or her telling you.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (30 March 2007):
 You love your daughter very much, she's growing up now and in her first serious relationship and obviously you'll be worried about her having sex. Will she know what to do? Will he treat her right? Will they use contraception? The best thing to do is talk to her about it. You don't have to come out and ask her outright. Let her know you've noticed they both seem very keen on one another and just hope she's sensible regarding intimacy. Tell her you were her age once and if she ever wants to talk to you about anything then you're there for her. You might be surprised at how much she'll appreciate you're there for her.
Eve
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (29 March 2007):
 If it's important that you know (ask yourself "why do I need to know this, and what am I going to do based on the answer I get?"), then you should be able to ask her. You ARE her mother. If you don't have the kind of relationship with your daughter that would lead her to confide in you when she ventures into the realm of sexual experimentations and more, then I doubt if you'll be able to determine the truth very easily.
There is no such thing as a "proper" relationship. Some teens never get into sex. Others are doing one another as soon as they get the chance. Most fall somewhere in between. I DO hope that you've at least seen to it that your daughter has been enabled to take precautions against pregnancy and STD's in case she IS sexually active. Even if you're guessing about "if," you don't want to bet your daughter's life on "whether".
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