A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I'm 17, and I've never had a boyfriend. This used to bother me up until a few week ago when I found out that there are actually quite a few people like me who have never been in a relationship. Recently I've been talking to a guy, he's 18 and we got introduced by one of my friends who goes to college with him. We've still not met however I really like him. I'm not sure if he likes me, he's really difficult to read. The other day he asked me if I like anyone, I didn't want to say him as it would be weird seen as though we have never met and it would be awkward if he had said 'Oh, Erm Thanks?', I asked him and he said 'I'm not sure if I like them or not yet'.Recently the conversations been abit morbid between us, just the general conversation starters, and that's it which I hate and find really off putting but I really want to get to know this guy a little better. Also, one of the things he does mention quite a lot is my friend who introduced us, lets call her 'Amy' he text me saying he 'had a good day as he had an awesome catch up with amy' and 'he was feeling crap cause he misses amy' i hate being the jealous type but I am and I know I'm probably over thinking this?I would like a boyfriend sometime soon, but I don't know the first thing about them. Basically I'd like advice on how to read guys, why we can talk about and what sort of things I should and shouldn't do in a relationship?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Young and in Love  +, writes (5 November 2012):
 You are adorable. I mean that in a good way. You seem like a nice, young girl. As far as this boy goes, I'd say to ask your friend "Amy" if she could act as a conduit for the two of you. Maybe she could find out whether or not he likes you, that way it won't be awkward for you. Aside from that, you could just try to talk to him about things you'd talk to Amy about. After all, you're her friend, and you get along, so by the transitive property, you should have stuff to talk to him about! Try being yourself around him. Creating a persona is never a good idea, cause you can only keep it up for so long.As for advice on guys in general; it's pretty much the same thing. Be yourself. If you like them, try to drop subtle hints, like being "just" close enough to make him think "She's getting a bit close to me. Maybe she's into me." You could make physical contact in innocent but noticeable ways, like extended hugs, putting your arm on their shoulder a bit when you're next to each other (not too invasively), and look and smile at them at times. One of the biggest misconceptions is that girls are the only ones that read into things "too much," but actually, guys read into them just as much (unless that person is utterly oblivious to a girl's advances).As for things to talk about, it's hard to say unless you tell us what hobbies and interest you have. I could say talk about things he likes (for example: sports, video games, movies, etc.), but unless you are interested in those things too, you'd be setting a false image of you that will eventually crumble, plus you wouldn't be able to keep up with the conversation. Try talking about things you like, but try to choose things that a guy might like too (Instead of Twilight coming soon, Iron Man 3 is coming soon; instead of books, maybe comics/manga; these are just stereotypical examples, but you get the idea).As for things you should and shouldn't do. Just be genuine and honest. A single lie (especially a silly one) will make them think they can't trust you (especially about serious things). Likewise, if you present yourself as something you aren't it will ruin the relationship later. How often have people said, "You've changed" or, "You're not the person I fell for." That's cause the person you fell for wasn't the genuine article. I suggest you avoid that pitfall.That said, don't worry about not having had a boyfriend yet, or stress about getting one. I didn't have a girlfriend till I was 18, (mostly by choice cause I didn't see the point prior to high school), and you know what, I've only had the one, and she's my wife, and I'm glad she was my first girlfriend also. So don't worry about rushing or feeling like you're falling behind. Like you said, there's plenty of people like you and you'll find the right guy, and more importantly, you can just be yourself when you meet him. Good luck.
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