A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I came out of a relationship just over 4 months ago. I guess my ex just decided she could do better and wanted to enjoy the freedom of being single. Since she split with me it's felt like there's been a dark cloud hanging over me. People have told me that in the long run she would regret the break up more than I would, because I treated her very well. But from what I can see; I'm the one who is suffering and she is the one happily getting on with her life.I don't understand. It can be argued that I put in more work than she did, but in the end I'm the one who has been left with his heartbroken and I am the one who is going through pain from this. Have you been here? Can you help me? It's killing me to think that I am the one who is going to dwell on this for the rest of his life, while she happily moves on. I loved her with all my heart, she has broken it, and has come away smiling. How can I cope? Will she ever regret this?
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (29 January 2008):
 Hi
She obviously didnt get as much from the relationship as you did. Thats not a reflection on you, if you knew you did the best you could. Its just not what she wanted/needed.
Ive never been with a nasty guy (apart from 1 that was a tad compulsive in the lying dept) and those relationships ended for various reasons. Its not normal to dwell on someone for months on end. Put it down to experience and accept that she wasnt as happy as you, and that could of been for all sorts of reasons. Maybe she just prefers to be single?
C xxxxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2008): Look all you can do is move on with your life! You are after wasting 4 months of it already pining for a girl who obviously doesn't want you. There are plenty of other girls out there who will appreciate and respect you more. My ex broke up with me and I was devasted, totally heartbroken over it all. I tried everything to win her back but her mind was made up. I realise now that I made a huge mistake by chasing after her, ringing her, sending her flowers etc now. Her mind was made up and there was noting I could do to change it. I spent the best part of a year pining over her and I urge you not to do the same. Go out there, enjoy your life, meet new friends and people. Wounds heal with time I discovered. Its an old saying but true... Best of luck with it all
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A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (29 January 2008):
Welcome to the world of women.They are the most heartless beings on earth.However,my experiences with women have taught me alot.Love them too much,you chase them away.Women don't want a man who can't even hide his emotions and affections but they also don't want a man who'll make them feel unwanted.Striking the balance is your homework.From my experience,having been where you are today,you are better off moving on.Don't depress yourself and be unfair on yourself.She left because she doesn't love you anymore and there's nothing under the sun you can do to force her heart to love you.Leave room for disappointment,my brother.One thing i strongly believe is that if you know you did your best be assured she'll remember you though it doesn't mean she'll come back.
Good Luck
Take care.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (29 January 2008):
 Your friends wanted to cheer you up and did not tell you the truth.
Now, you know the truth that you are the more clingy and the loser .
If you still love her, go woo her again and start from scratch.
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