A
female
age
51-59,
*erryA
writes:Three weeks ago my partner of four years left me. He went back to his ex wife. They have no kids but his mother always wanted them to get back together and his ex never gave up on contacting him. He was very torn as he loves me and loves my company and said it would be me he wants to be on a desert island with.... but he said he felt he had a duty and was under pressure. Also.... she has money and I don't have a lot at the moment and he was experiencing financial difficulties. I have been trying to get on with things... although it has only been a short time since he left and I can't stop thinking about how great we were together. It really hurts and I am fighting against loneliness.He has started emailing me saying he misses me and asking how I am. He says he wants to be my friend still. I don't really know how to handle this. I won't be used... but I still want him and love him.
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ex-wife, get back together, his ex, money Reply to this Question
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female
reader, KerryA +, writes (18 November 2008):
KerryA is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone. You are helping me gain more strength. I am really hurting but i am going to be gorgeous and confident and show the world how fab i am. Buffy has your looking good and happy and healthy and seeming together made him think about you or contact you? xx
A
female
reader, buffy 37 +, writes (18 November 2008):
I feel so sorry for you i am just out of an 11yr relationship 5 weeks now and i no how hard it is but i just keep telling myself i will survive this and it will make me stronger in the long run. i have tried a few wee tricks which has my x thinking about me a lot more, get your hair done it makes you feel better about yourself and boosts your selfasteam , let him see your looking and feeling good and that you can live without him ,dont get into any arguments with him if your talking to him on the phone just simply say its nice to talk to you if he rings but keep it short and sweet try not to let him see how much you are hurting men love to think we cant live without them, even if your feeling like your heart is being ripped out dont let him no that! that might make him think about what he has give up , and go out and enjoy yourself eat healthy which will show on your skin and smile at him and look really happy that will have him thinking at the end of the day it is his loss and if he's away back to a relashionship that didnt work first time it probally wont work this time either and espically if hes only away back for her money but chin up us girls are a lot stronger that men would like to think we are please let me know how you get on and email me any time i no what your going through i still love my x but i will survive with or without him xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): he is playing you. he knows he has hurt you but then wants you around to be his friend? is that incase it doesn't work with the wife? i think you are worth a lot more than that! these types of men think they can have it all,the wife, the girlfriend.... do yourself a favour,tell him to stick with his wife because you have a life to live, do you really want that baggage? good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): Hi Dont be USED, tell him to get lost he had his chance and blew it let him rot in his own mess, take pride in yourself and don't allow this USER to use you, he used his ex then went back, allow her to be used, leopards dont change their spots, if he had wanted to be on a desert island with you then he could have done that and at least that way he wouldn't have been in contact with the other woman. Take your dignity and leave him to get on with his own pitifull life, let him use her not you, I am glad that at least you are taking the time to ask the questions rather than let him manipulate you with words, action always speak louder than any words his actions speak volumes. All the best with a happy future. xx
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