A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Went away on Saturday for one night with my partner. Nice to get away from the home and all the chores. I feel like Cinderella sometimes. Had a walk on the Saturday plus a meal out. Sunday we had a walk and I had a swim in the sea. Debating if to go home or not on the Sunday or stay out an extra night and return on the Monday. I did want to stay out again but this following week we are to watch a bike show one and a half hours fromhome. We were thinking of seeing our son who lives close by where this is going on and thinking we could see him and the show and stay away the night. My partner was short on cash on the Saturday so I would have had to paid for the room for the night if we were going to stay out again. I was thinking to much of the following weekend before this one and what it would cost. We did not stay the extra night in the end.Now I wished we had. We came home on the Sunday and it was 9.50pm at night. Birds had made a mess in our gutters and dropped grass from them on the pavement. I was going to leave it and clean up the next day but decided to brush up the grass. I heard a laugh from the house next door and assumed someone was sitting outside in there garden and laughing because I was brushing up so late. I got annoyed and I had smelt cigarette smoke so knew they must of been smoking. I said in a loudish voice do they would hear me, The stink of horrible smoke, hoping they would hear me.I had come home in a not to bad mood but when I heard the laugh it got to me. Now they could have been laughing at anything but I put it down to me brushing up so late and knowing we should have stayed away the extra night I hatred myself for not doing it. I cursed myself for us coming home and thinking that we might stay away the following weekend so go home and wait a week then we would be away again. I blamed my partner saying he wanted to come back. He did say he did not mind driving home quite a lot to me and was saying about the following weekend Day we might stay away. He then says later that if he had had the money he would have stayed away the extra night. I did say to him that I was going to pay but he says that I wanted to come back. I’m all the money in the world, the last place I want to be is backHome doing chores. I blamed him for not saying he wanted to stay out and I blame myself for thinking to much about staying out the following weekend and spending money on that. I came home and had a good cry and just felt bloody mad with myself for coming home instead of staying away.When I had had the swim on the Saturday I went the toilets to get changed and cried in there. I cried because I knew being happy was not going to last long and it would end how felt. It was like I felt it was going to good to be true and that’s when I argued with my partner and it went all down hill from there.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2024): It strikes me that you are blaming yourself for a perfectly sensible decision to come home!
It's a "what if" situation but you have no way of knowing that the extra night would have been beneficial.
The extra expense would have led to more stress and maybe arguements.
I expect the neighbour was laughing at something on his phone or in his life, totally unconnected to you.
He would have a sad-assed life if he was laughing at you.
Does this neighbour intimidate you to some extent?
Life at home can be miserable once your neighbours are getting too involved and you're not getting on.
This could be part of the reason you needed to get away!
You sound a bit vulnerable at the moment so be kind to yourself whenever you can.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2024): It strikes me that you are blaming yourself for a perfectly sensible decision to come home!
It's a "what if" situation but you have no way of knowing that the extra night would have been beneficial.
The extra expense would have led to more stress and maybe arguements.
I expect the neighbour was laughing at something on his phone or in his life, totally unconnected to you.
He would have a sad-assed life if he was laughing at you.
Does this neighbour intimidate you to some extent?
Life at home can be miserable once your neighbours are getting too involved and you're not getting on.
This could be part of the reason you needed to get away!
You sound a bit vulnerable at the moment so be kind to yourself whenever you can.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2024): There is important context here that would put this into perspective.
Do you live with your partner? I understand you don't share finances which would suggest this to be a 'no'. If this is the case then I understand a little why you would be annoyed to be home. Not to the extent of being annoyed at the neighbours etc but I can understand the regret about not extending your break and feeling frustrated with yourself. You're probably annoyed with your partner for their lack of decision-making and for not having more of a forceful say. What you need to understand however is they didn't have the funds and by the sounds neither did you.
Now, if on the other hand you do live with your partner then I would say this: you have issues that go beyond an extra night in a hotel. Your emotions are way over the top about all this. There must be something really lacking at home for you to be so bereft over returning home from a one night break. I could certianly understand holiday blues but the tears are not the usual response. You should have a good think about what it is that is lacking and work on it as regular breaks away won't resolve this.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2024): Sounds like you enjoyed the trip away and so did your partner. Why not go away regularly if you have the money?
Home is never the same as a holiday and ok so you were fed up coming home. Please don't let a small argument or the neighbour laughing at you spoil the memory of the nice time you had.
Holidays are holidays and everyday life is just that. You don't say you're unhappy with your partner or anything so I'm guessing the relationship is OK. Could you do something like having days or meals out? Then the chores won't seem too bad and you can both enjoy yourselves until the next trip away.
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