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female
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*nn-marie
writes: I have been seeing my boyfriend since February since meeting online. I moved in with him almost a month ago. Before there was so much affection and we made love regularly. Since moving in we don't make love and affection is limited, though we get on great. I know I have high expectations and did tell him long before that the thing that scares me is passion dying. I wanted the fairy tale. At the time he reassurred me that that wouldn't happen - but it has. It is always me that makes moves on him and he just responds by saying there more to a relationship than sex. I've tried to talk to him but he just says life isn't a fairy tale and all relationships go like this - reality! I feel so sad and miss what we were like before. Im 31 and already have been married twice - maybe I expect too much???
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male
reader, Amore +, writes (29 July 2005):
Hi!
Right, next time he walks into the house, make sure he walks into a candlelit room with you standing there in sexy lingerie! Any red-blooded man would fall to his knees for a setting like that, and that would most probably put a spark in your relationship.
Alternatively, if that sort of thing isnt you, respond to "more to a relationship than sex" by telling him every relationship needs a healthy sexual life in order to work.
All that "life isn't a fairy tale" stuff is bullcrap, without passion in a relationship, you two are no more than two best friends! Tell him that, and ask what he is scared of, because it sounds as if he has some issues in his life.
No, you don't expect too much hun, you just recieve too little! As i say to every response I do, communication is the only way around personal situations, so you must, must, must talk to him, but make sure it doesn't turn into a flamefest! Speak like adults, and act like adults. The best advice i can give you.
Good luck hun, X Amore
A
reader, becky05 +, writes (29 July 2005):
Your partner is right....life isnt a fairy tale, you need to be happy with what you have. If you keep looking for a fairy tale relationship you aree going to spend your life very dissapointed.
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