A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey this isnt a relationship question sorry.Right i went to a huge birthday party on the eighth of may and there was sixty odd people there, most of them either 16 or 17 and one 18 year old. (my mum bought my alcohol as im not eighteen for a few months, and she new about it all!)We got kicked out of the party at around half 9, because her parents found out, so as everyone had to leave pretty rapidly we just grabbed duvets, alcohol and peoples bags and left and walked down to a field thats sometimes used for football matches etc thats about a minute walk from where we were. we sorted all our things out, and then sat around in a circle talking and drinking, and some people were dancing. When the police turned up, most of them ran and a few of us just walked off.Two police officer's stopped me and my boyfriend checked that we were sober, and then searched my bag taking all my alcohol off me and taking our details.I thought they were just doing there job so i didnt really mind, untill we met back up with everyone else who were stood openly drinking with the same police officers and having a joke. They had only taken me and my boyfriends details out of 60 people.To make things worse, they lied on the letter that got sent home. My mum read it today and then showed me when i got in, and it says that i was carrying a 750ml bottle of cider ( i cant stomach cider since i got my stomach pumped after being stupid!),4 bottles of vodka and 3 bottles of coke with vodka mixed into it.I am fuming, as i had 4 bottles of coke on me, only one of those open, none were mixed as i had a cup in my hand so i didnt need to fiddle with bottles and i had one 20cl bottle of vodka. My mum new this too.Im considering writing a letter of complaint as i think there ment to be doing a good duty for the community, not picking on two teenagers out of sixty and then saying in the letter that they practically had a mini alcohol store on them. Do you think i will be taking seriously if i put my complaint into a letter and send it them?Thank you in adavnce xx Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2009): I think you are in for a rough road ahead of you, you don't have a chance as you were raised by irresponsible parents as well.
It isn't your mom's job to be your friend and buy you alchohol when you are underage, I don't care that you are 8 weeks away from being 18 or that you went to a birthday party for an 18 year old, it is irresponsible and dangerous. I think the legal drinking age should be higher than 18, in my country it is 21...and even then that is sometimes too young because I still remember what it was like to be 21 and thinking I was invincible.
It troubles me that you don't get that you broke the law, were a nuisance hanging out in a park with a bunch of noisy drunk kids and that you are mad only because you got caught and were made an example of, but you got off with a warning or a letter and you are mad because they mentioned more beverages than you claim you actually had? You are lucky that you didn't get arrested.
I don't know what the laws are in UK, but in the US, if you or anyone had gotten behind the wheel drunk and gotten hurt or killed and you were underage and supplied alcohol by your mom, she would go to jail and be charged with murder or manslaughter, she would be responsible having provided the alchohol. At college campuses around the states, no alchohol is allowed at sorority and fraternity sponsored parties as the fraternity or sorority are liable. It is just a fact of life that is too bad, but people, young people do not drink responsibly.....and over drinking is a huge problem in college age kids and many die from alchohol poison or car accidents involving alcohol before their lives even get started as an adult.
You have had your stomach pumped....so you must get that alchohol can be deadly in a number of ways.
I think an adult providing alchohol to a minor so he can drink at home is a really bad idea...why start a drinking habit one of drinking to excess just because you think he is going to do it any way? If a kid learns from example then he will think twice about underage drinking in the first place...
A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (31 May 2009):
 Seriously, just accept that you did something wrong. If you don't want to be treated this way then don't break the law in the first place. The police were making an example out of you in front of your friends, trying to teach them that eventually they will be punished. It just so happened that the unlucky one was you. You should of thought about this before you started drinking in a field.
Not only were you underage drinking, which is illegal, you were also drinking outside in the street, which is also illegal. And people living in the surrounding area do not need to be listening to a rowdy bunch of underage drinkers hanging around in a field like a bunch of chavs. It's anti social behaviour and people shouldn't have to put up with it. If I ever saw that happening near my house, I would call the police immediately.
Just learn your lesson and move on. You won't be taken seriously because you BROKE THE LAW. If you don't do that again, then you never have to have any contact with the police again.
It's also illegal to supply alcohol to a minor, you might want to let your mum know that - she's lucky they didn't come pay her a visit too.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (31 May 2009):
 We are so stupid, that we ask a DATING ADVISE site if if we should make an official complaint to the police, when we have obviously broken the law....
Oh NO wait a minute, that was you, but thanks for putting your case across!
When you can buy booze by yourself you can start moaning about being treated like an adult.
Also I was referring to the police complaints commission (being busy) not the community support officers who took your drink away. I think for all your ranting about being a mature nearly 18 year old you have made yourself out to look very immature indeed!
But hey that's just coming from a "stupid" grown up opinion!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2009): I wont be writing to this site again.
You obviously didnt read what i wrote, armyMedic and anon, considering you both referred to me as a sixteen year child, when i quite clearly stated that i was 17 and nearly eighteen ( 8 weeks)
I also said that police checked that i was sober, as they would be allowed to take me to a cell if i wasnt.
Yet again i was referred to as a drunk sixteen year old.
Oh and another thing i clearly stated that i was going to an eighteenth birthday party so my mum bought me alcohol, as im 8 weeks off being able to buy my own. Not to go drink in a park, where the hell was that mentioned in my question?
and let me ask you this armymedic. If the police have so much free time to work on "high profile cases" then what were they doing searching 17 year olsd who were kicked out of a birthday party, and laughing and joking with others? shouldnt they be on there "high profile cases" pfft. I think not.
Oh and my mum charged with neglect? A seventeen year old univeristy student usually does go out drinking, and my mother doesnt want me to do what other students are doing. Selling themselfs for alcohol, stealing it and sitting outside shops asking older members to buy it them.
I think you should seriously consider whether you should allowed to be agony aunts, as agony aunts are ment to actually read the questions and referr to it, and offer different view points of advice, not scan the question and then pretty much make up there own story
"apparently i was a sixteen year old in a park, want to add anthing else to it? A sixteen year old in a park doing drugs whilst having rough sex.?"
God your stupid.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (28 May 2009):
Yes send a letter to the police complaints commission, I'm sure dealing with a letter from an angry underage drinker is something they will take seriously, but remember they are busy looking into the Charles De Menzies and other high profile cases so it may take some time to get back to you.
Also if you were in the wrong (which I think as a pissed 16 year old, you will have been) charges could be brought against you or your parents, as your mum is meant to supervise you when you drink alcohol not give you booze to drink with your mates in a park!
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (28 May 2009):
 well if you put in a complaint they may charge you you may want to correct them if they take this matter further and if people knew then tell them who saw what was their. if they drop the matter i would leave well alone as YOU were UNDERAGE and YOU WERE CARRYING BOOZE which is ILLEGAL so in reality if they dont punish you i wouldnt push your luck as they may take the matter more serious if they feel like their being dictated to if you under stand what im saying it may get worse. only capitalising keys points note. good luck with that aphex xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2009): U should not be drinking at your age any way and your mum should be charged with neglect. My friend had a few at her boyfriends for her sweet sixteenth and guess what shes dead! She never woke up. Think before you act or there can be serious things that result. Your mum getting arrested for supplying alcohol or her loosing her daughter and going through the guilt and courts like my friends mum
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