A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello Everyone, I am in a situation that I need help with. I have been in a relationship with a guy for 2 years. When i first met him I fell a connection right away. I was the one who pursued him and I was the one who initially wanted to be in a relationship. After 7 months of dating, he finally asked me to be his girlfriend in Vegas when we went for a trip. I fell in love with this guy. I saw him as "the one" I would marry someday and have a family with. Somewhere along the line, I suddenly felt disconnected with him. I didn't look forward to his calls, hang outs, and kisses. I don't know what to do, one day i love him so much, the next i couldn't even give him a hug that i actually mean. A few days ago, we spent the weekend in Vegas. I thought it would bring up old sparks and make everything better, but it didn't. I have never felt anything like this before. I am scared because he noticed some signs for a few days now. I know this transition did not happen in one day. I've been feeling like this for a month. It's not that I don't want to lose him, I don't want to lose the love that I felt for him before, because those were the happiest moments in my life. Please, I need serious answers. I need someone to explain to me what i'm going through and how i can fix this. Please help.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2013): Your relationship has reached it's expiration date.
When you're as young as you are, every significant relationship is thought to be the one that will last forever. You start planning years in advance up to weddings and kids.
You are fueled by the good-times and momentum of the honeymoon phase of the relationship. Then you reach the two-year mark, and the relationship starts to slow down.
Ah...that "two-year mark!" The final stretch. The relationship lost steam at 18 months. The last six seems to be the longest distance to the finish-line. Your legs are getting get heavy, you're winded.
When you go out with your bf; you look around. All those other guys are starting to look so attractive. You miss being single. Having the option to fly solo; or accept a date from a cute guy. Hanging out with your girlfriends, flirting and shooting guys down. Bathing in attention and being hit on. You made your own decisions. Stayed out as late as you pleased. He's sweet, but you're just tired of him.
Suddenly the alter and wedding dress you used to vividly fantasize about starts to fade far into the horizon. Your mind no longer pictures him in your future, and you don't think about having kids anymore. Just wondering how the hell did you even get this far with this guy. You're tired and bored with this relationship.
Okay, time to get your speech together. You've decided you want to end your relationship and you're dragging your feet.
Come clean and be honest. You gave it a try, and it isn't working. Set him free. He already knows the writing is on the wall. Stop holding him in suspense.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2013): Is it not that you fell out of love with him? The spark is gone? There is always the possibility that you like the chase and once you have conquered it loses its appeal. The other reason could just be that you have other things happening in your life. I don't think anyone can really explain what has happened and you are best judge of your situation and feelings.
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