A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am very deeply, sexually attracted to my second cousin. I'm confused whether he returns my feelings - I'm 18 and he's 26. It's not a phase. I've had a very visceral reaction to him since I was very young, about 11 years old. Even though I've hoped that it would fade or I would grow out of it, I haven't. So as soon as I go to college, I will pursue it, as I will have my own dorm and won't have my parents around. Some things:When I was 13 and he was 21, he used to hang out with me every weekend. It was never anything sexual, but he would tell me that he likes my hugs very much and would hold my hand or put his head on my shoulder occasionally. We drifted apart for some years but recently started hanging out again (the drifiting was a conscious effort on my part because I was ashamed of my feelings). We sleep in the same room when I sleep over, but never in the same bed. He is very curious about my own personal life and interactions with boys at school, and tells me about his own relationships. He has told me to tell guys that are interested in me that I already have a boyfriend, and to scare them away by telling them about him. He's very attractive, funny, caring and smart, but doesn't have any girls he is attracted to and hasn't had a girlfriend in years. I've never had a boyfriend, and I consider myself very attractive.We have the same values and level of maturity. Do you think I should pursue it? I'm so scared of acting on my feelings and him being repulsed or grossed out. But on the other hand, I'm so sexually frustrated that I'm distracted and angry.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2010): I agree that this could turn out badly for you. I don't believe he'll turn away a chance of sleeping with you but to date you is well that maybe a little much. What if he like you in that way too. There's only one way to find out so I guess its boils down to you. If it was me and I didn't want to go there I would play with your feeling and it would stay between us two for all sakes.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 October 2010):
 Ok well he is your 2nd cousin so this may cause a lot of trouble within your family, however its not illegal and you are 18 so your old enough to make up your own mind.
however the way you have described things it sounds like he cares a lot about you as in your is wee cousin and he is looking out for you am just afraid that if you try anything on you could get hurt by his rejection and it will ruin your friendship with him. but it is entirely your choice hun.
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