| A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: what does a woman really want in a guy? I hear stories that they want a sweet, caring loyal man who they can cuddle up with and will treat them write yet there are woman going out at night getting drunk and looking for sex. So please tell me what a woman really wants, I know its different for every woman but surely there are things that are a man 'must' have or be able to do for every woman? thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2007): A woman want to feel special. even if they are ugly, they want to feel that they are the most beautiful woman on earth. tell them lies to flatter them. give them suprises, show them something that is unexpected. be unpredictable, be funny and be great!!! in BED.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2007): 1) a guy that will stick up for them
2) a guy who will be a gentlemen
3) a guy that will cry with them wen them both are watching a really sad movie
4) a guy who will
5) a guy who has a sense of humor
6) a guy who understands their feelings and wont laugh at the girl for sharing her feelings no matter how strong they are
well thats all I have I hope that helps! Good Luck!f
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A
female
reader, amberlyn +, writes (6 January 2007):
confedence!!!! not cockyness but confedence my your self it's a major turn on. be comfortable with yourself first and then it's like a perfume (i suppose is the best way to put it) but dont get cocky or stuck up otherwise you'll strike out. be able to laugh at yourself and dont let anyone stand on you. above all smile (its a winner!!) and enjoy yourself first.
good luck.
p.s the old romantic stuff does work but dont slap it on to much it comes off as sleazy.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (2 January 2007):
 Well it doesn't hurt if he has money.
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A
female
reader, Pretty and proud  +, writes (2 January 2007):
 if you think that you are a kind loyal caring guy who never cheats then its the woman who is the problem not you. for example i like a guy who says im beautiful not "hot" and who can cuddle up and thinks about my feelings. i could go on forever about my perfect man. write a list about yourself and your qualities, then find the woman to suit those qualities, dont change yourself for anyone you just need to find the right person. the woman who goes around town looking for sex has either been hurt or just is horny and doesnt want any relationship. a real man will NEVER take advantage and have sex with them when they are drunk and want it because 9 out of 10 of them will wake up the next morning knowing they have disgraced themselves the night before! i hope i have helped in some way!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2007):
Isnt it a little naive to think that *every* woman is going to want the same thing? And at ever stage of their life? Women have brains just like us- its just not credible to expect them all to be the same.
I'll assume, 16-17yo male reader, that your real question is that they- girls in your age range- arent buying what you are putting out there.
There are lots of books on developing "game" and you may want to look into it just to see what you are doing wrong, although I would *really* advise against becoming a player. What you ought to do it:
-practice your approach. Either on line or just talking to girls without worry about 'picking them up'.
- sell into a scarce market. Try talking with 29-30 year olds. If you are white, date asians. Being the best 16 year old white guy in your school might be hard, but being the best guy an Korean transfer student knows might be easy.
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A
female
reader, carrie_cares +, writes (2 January 2007):
 Firstly if the question that you have asked is in relation to one specific woman then get to know her and you'll soon find out her ideal type and whether you fit the bill.
As you have pointed out all women are different but there are a few main things that we all share; Honesty, loyality and for the man to be himself. If you try and be someone you are not then you set yourself up for a big fall and risk hurting the woman as well as yourself. Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, Clarey +, writes (2 January 2007):
 The most important thing a woman wants, is to know you as yourself. You need to have the same interests and values, so there is no point in pretending that you are something other than you are.
Having said that, a woman also needs to know that you are taking time to decide whether she is right for you. Everyone needs to show that they are choosing a person for certain qualities, there is nothing more off-putting that being persued by someone who appears desperate.
If you select carefully before even thinking about asking for a date you will be on better ground than choosing a person for the way they look. Obviously you need to be attracted, but men who look for stereotype may have a slightly warped way of judging people.
Look inside the person, get to know them as people and if you find things in common and a like for the person based on who they are, as well as liking for yourself, you won't have to worry too much about what women want. Every woman is different and you can not possibly decide on a formula for all.
Hang back, be cool, take time and be confident in your choice. There is nothing more flattering to a female than knowing that out of all others you chose her for your time, for good and complimentary reasons. Make sure you are choosing for the right reasons, prize your own welfare highest. Then you will be fine and all other theories will seem unimportant.
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A
female
reader, Lilly223 +, writes (2 January 2007):
 A man must have confidence in himself and his abilities (what ever they may be.) He must have a sense of purpose, something he strives for, the ability to keep us on our toes and interested (with out hurting us.) He must be secure in both his masculinity and his softerside and be willing to show us both. He must be real and genuine to himself, his friends, his co-workers and to us. He must be able to speak his mind, make a decision, and stand his ground, but also be able to compromise and have compassion for others. Soounds complicated but it all boils down to that we want a man who is true to himself.
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A
female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell +, writes (2 January 2007):
 Hey,
Well, I'm glad you've noticed that each woman wants a different thing in her "Ideal Man"
Your question does cause me to wonder...are you asking this out of pure interest or is there someone you're trying to impress???
Some women are real fans of tough love, some want men who are more sensitive. I think every girl wants her man to be loyal!
There are several (stero-type) groups of men that different women want:
Old Fashioned Romance:
Candles, Roses, long walks together, etc etc... a charmer.
The No-Goers:
A realtionship they both know won't go anywhere but enjoy the "having fun" bit without the settling down. (This tends to be younger people who don't want to think about marriage and kids and scary stuff like that!)
...There are More...
The point is, you can never tell what a woman wants just by looking at her. It's just like us girls know that different guys want different things in girls. We just try being ourselves and hope that what we have naturally (eg - a good sense of humor etc...) Is what they have been looking for. It takes a long time to work, but when it does, it's just great.
I think the one "Must" for every woman is loyalty. (Cuteness goes without saying though bear in mind, different people have different definitions of the word "cute" !!!)
I think what you've heard about women getting drunk and looking for sex is mainly young people (refer back to the "No-Goerd" catergory) Who just want to have a good time and meaningless sex, no strings attached...and then there are people who don't go for that stuff at all, even if they don't want to settle down!!!
Trust me, girls are complicated. And by the time you've finished reading this, you may even be considering locking yourself into a cupboard to avoid all the aggro of trying to find the right girl for you. But like I said, looking for the right person is worth it, you'll know what I mean when you do!
Hope this helped!
Phoebe xxXxx
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