A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I'm going to an 18th party at the weekend with the new boyfriend. Planning on getting him drunk and then because we are sleeping the night (drunk) in a bed was gonna take things to the next level.He's a virgin though.We will have been going out for exactly 2 weeks by the party.How can I go to the next level at this party without him thinking I'm getting him drunk and using him for sex/his virginity?----My boyfriend has never had a girlfriend before me and is a terrible kisser!I find kissing a deal-breaker for me if it isn't done properly, as I even prefer it to sex. It makes me feel intimate.What can I do to make him a better kisser without directly telling him? Do guys even like kissing?Or do they just do it because it leads to sex?----I really like my boyfriend, but he is just so skinny, and my ex was a thug but he was broad and sexy.How can I politely ask my boyfriend to go to the gym and become more of a man for me?----What is the stigma attached to love bites? Why are they considered tacky?I love recieving them but I gave one to my boyfriend and his mum found in and I'm slightly worried it may have damaged her reputation of me.----What are some cute gift ideas for my new boyfriend? We have only been together for a short time, and we are both 17. But I want to seem like a cute girlfriend and make a good first impression :)----Can you please give me some cute date ideas for my new boyfriend of 2 weeks before we start getting more sexual? I think if we go out for a month or so and get to know each other before anything else happens, it will keep things sweet :)But what do people do for dates?----I want to bake my boyfriend some kind of dessert.What type of sweet food would really show him I cared? Does anyone have any recipes that could help me?----How do I go about sleeping with my boyfriend when my parents are always in when he's round and his are always in when I'm round his house? I'm getting tired of just kissing.----[Mod note: 9 submissions from same user were combined into one comprehensive question as the OP's (original poster's) questions all involve the same boyfriend and the same dating concerns. Thank you!]
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 March 2013):
 “planning on getting him drunk and then… take thngs to the next level”
Ewww so you plan to take advantage of him when he’s not fully functional mentally due to alcohol. That’s called DATE RAPE dear. And it’s WRONG on so many levels. Just because you are a woman doesn’t mean you can bully him into sexual activity. That’s lousy.
You are barely dating at 2 weeks out.
As fo kissing… well if you don’t like the way he kisses you need to teach him.. nothing wrong with showing him how you like it and saying… ‘could you move your tongue a bit more… or not so wide… or whatever you need to say….
DO GUYS like kissing… most of the men I’ve been with do…. It’s not a male thing or a female thing it’s a person thing… some people like it some don’t.
How can I politely ask my boyfriend to go the gym? YOU CAN’T what you can do is leave this man that you have been with for a mere two weeks…. So far you want to change his virginity, the way he kisses and his body…. So what exactly are the reasons you are with this man?
On love bites: my husband used to cover me with them when we first started dating… I hate them.. they are trashy and tacky… and if you get one by mistake, oh well that happens but to do them on purpose is disgusting in my opinion.
You are dating two weeks… what do you need to gift him for? You want to seem like a cute girlfriend (but he’s a lousy kisser, and I want to take advantage of him and rob him of his virginity when he’s not fully capable of consenting and I don’t like his body) but what gift can I give him that will make me seem cute and make a good first impression. Honey if he’s your boyfriend you are beyond first impressions.
What do people do for dates? Umm.. movies, dinners, coffee out, walks in the park, museums…
What kind of sweet dessert would show him I cared. Is this before or after you date rape him, give him love bites and try to bribe him with a gift on a date?
And finally, it’s two weeks, your 17 and you are moving way too fast…
If you want to have sex with your boyfriend rent a hotel room and do it there in privacy like adults. But it’s way too soon honey… you are dating 2 weeks, he’s a virgin and you have a list of things that you don’t like about him and you are planning to date rape him.
GET A HOLD Of your hormones and relax.
A
female
reader, uzer  +, writes (25 March 2013):
1. Don't get him drunk and have sex with him. That's like raping him. I'm sure he'd rather be aware of his first time too. Try not getting him drunk and just letting things run their course. If you're both in the mood, it will probably happen. And you probably don't want to hear this, but it seems like this whole 'sex' thing is being rushed. It's pretty soon, especially with your age.2. Teach him. Give him some pointers. I'm sure he won't mind if you're just trying to help. Don't be overly critical about it either.3. I really don't think it's a good idea to pressure someone you're with into looking a certain way unless they are unhealthy. If it's worth it, you'll grow to love his body and not compare him to your ex.4. That doesn't sound like anything to worry about. It may have made her uncomfortable and maybe even disgusted or angry, but the only thing that matters is how you are when you two actually meet. If you turn out to be great, that won't even matter to her.5. Try making something for him. Food, a card, a drawing, poem, song. Things that show your creativity and character are always cute, in my opinion.6. Cafes, picnic if the weather is nice, movies. At this point, just spending time anywhere and getting to know each other will be interesting.7. I think cookies are a really cute and sweet idea. I baked some for my LDR boyfriend and he loved it.8. You're definitely moving too fast. This is clearly a sign that you guys don't really need to be having sex if you're too young to even have privacy. You should probably get to know him more first. You're only 17 and you've only known this guy for a short time.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2013): I can't even read the rest of this because it just seems like you are taking advantage of your boyfriend. It's been 2 weeks- WAYYY too early for sex. Also, don't do it drunk! And let him maybe decide/initiate when he wants to do it??? He sounds like a KID go easy on him. If you can't slow your roll, you're gonna need to find someone else...
It's too early for big gifts- just get him his favorite coffee or candy if you feel compelled to do so.
You can google brownie or cookie recipes
He should be planning the dates- not you
Maybe I'm old fashioned but that's just the way to show respect for yourself and him.
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