A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: here is my situation. i'm 29 and i would say my experience with relationships is almost none. it's very fringy for me to open up. i would say i get deep into things rather than play the small talk game with people. i try but i don't feel comfortable with that totally. i open up to some girls and i do great but i think it's much different if i'm attracted to them, then i really close up. i don't care about finding a girlfriend. i think i would just like to be comfy around women in a social setting and not even analyze her as a prospect, even if they're gorgeous. i get anxiety even at a dog park if i'm having a conversation and i run out of things to say or she's too pretty and refrain myself from making an approach, or if she's pretty and speaking to me i'll tell myself "she's with someone". i'm getting out there, or at least, i've discovered places to meet people that are also at my level, by that i mean that clubs are not my thing so much. i'm more into playing pool, going to the dog park, hiking, working out, dive bars watching sports, and sometimes just typing on my laptop at a starbucks. i'm usually by myself because it's the most convenient to do what you want and not make a date. i think the problem with making new friends maybe i get to comfortable doing my thing by myself most the time i don't have an urge to do it with a friend and can't build experience. it's when i feel lonely that i get down on myself but that happens a lot less than before, like only once a month i'd say, compared to four or five five year ago. i do not have any female acquaintences anymore and that's what i'd like to work on. i know that the way i project myself is key but how can i hide that i lack social skills? i'm not too bad but i think i'm just a wee level below that women will only be polite in the moment and not remain as a future acquaintance.
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male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (14 January 2010):
wow, dude i think your giving women way to much credit, you think there to pretty while they spend an hour getting dressed in the morning looking in the mirror hating themselves. My butts to big oh no more belly fat blah blah blah lol
You need to really take a chill pill be calm cool and collective so what if shes to pretty even better talk to her any way i would rather be with a too pretty girl then settle for an 800 lb gorrilla or whale or hippo w/e
Dating is hard i agree mostly because by the time women get to our ripe old ages there so bitter and mistrusting and man hating because of all the jerks they dated in HS that broke there hearts and blah blah blah, the thing is you gotta be confident and just have this "IDGAF" attitude,
talk to girls and you dont need small talk cut straight to the point some times it works i find asking a girl to sleep with you works just about as good as telling her you love her some are always gonna run away cant have em all but you can try,
ok so you really need to decide what do you want from a woman a one nite stand frequent sex or marriage then make your move accordingly, all i can say is if you ever wanna have sex again you better start approaching women whats the worst she can do besides getting a restraining order for stalking, but she has to prove that
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