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male
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anonymous
writes: My wife is at the end of her rope on my case. I have some mayor sexual problem, but nobody could figure it out so far what is it. It started years ago, and now we tried all help,but I wonder ,if anybody could relate to it. She is a beautiful woman, many man would be happy to have her, she looks 15 years younger,and I love her. We got married 26 years ago, and we have children. But a few years ago ,all in a sudden , I developed an erectile dysfunction, and mayor desire problems.Most man knows about both ,but many does not have both. And especially, that they don't know why. Like I heard many guys ,who are very horny, but they can't get it up ,when they see their woman, even they have no medical problems. And there are the guys ,who have medical problems, so they can tell their wife ,why is this. And its up to her, if she wants it or not. And there are guys, who just does not care about their wife,because she is fat or they are bored, but they love other ones,like porn or just younger girls. So ,how I said it, I don't know anybody, who just simply doesn't care for sex, and never really feels sexual thoughts,and when finally we have sex,I have no erection or,I can't maintain it. So ,I'm panicked ,because I don't fall into any of the categories. We do have lots of stress, but who doesn't? And this whole problem is chronic, and seems permanent. What can I do in this situation, does anybody has something like that?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): I agree. You need a therapist. You can't do this to your wife,and it looks like ,you can't handle this yourself! You need help. This is over on the limit!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): It is very hard to believe ,what you are saying. I think,you are not admitting something to yourself. Why are you doing this? It is very unlikely that sexual needs just vanish ,without a reason. Were you taught to hide your feelings ,when you were a child? Are you afraid of the consequences of telling the truth? Those are the questions,I would ask. If you can't do it alone ,find a therapist!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): Thanks for answering. No ,I don't seem to have desire at all/ I know,it is probably something psychological,but Im not sure who could go any deeper,than a councilor. It looks like ,it is kind of a unique case. My wife thinks ,Im hiding something from myself. But seriously ,wouldn't I know? I wish if somebody would have the same problem, and would let me know.
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A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (25 September 2010):
 Have you tried seeing a sex therapist? This seems like something psychological that may need some time-consuming working out. I can't really see anything else to do. Can you get turned on by anything at all? Or is it just your wife?
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