A
female
 ,
*ummyduckling
writes:Hey need a lil advice from the guys really.... Um.. how can i start.... ive been single for a while now and i would really like a boyfriend but all the guys in my area/town hate/dislike me because i have a bad reputation (a castrator of all things and being emo/ goth really doesnt help) and for years i have had this reputation from a rumour that started over 5 years ago... i would really lke to get rid of this reputation and get some more male friends to get to know them in hopes of one being a potential boyfriend.... plus i would like some tips as to how guys like girls to be when chatting , flirting all the usual stuff because being myself tends to scare most guys... please guys your avice would be helpfull... and girl if ur like me and know how to get a guy your advice would be very usfull too. Thankies :-D
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female
reader, atarisrocks +, writes (29 November 2006):
 well im goth/emo and i have no problem getting guys and they many all been more on the chavy side just befriend the guy first coz then they see ur personiaty first more than ur looks
A
female
reader, dummyduckling +, writes (29 November 2006):
dummyduckling is verified as being by the original poster of the question thank you all for the advice its going well so far and ive already met a few great guys :D thankies again!!!!!
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A
female
reader, jessekk69 +, writes (28 November 2006):
 Im a full on goth and got a man. just be honest and yourself, there will be men out there who will love you for who you are. your just looking in the wrong places. xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006):
Ha! appearently being seen as a castrator means people dont want to associate with you. Good information so you can self sensor 'humorous' comments in the future.
Ther is no point in cleaning up your image if you really are feeling the goth vibe. Rather you should focus on being more available and approachable. Go to more events and parties where guys are likely to be. Check out the local goth bands. Maybe a signing by a graphic artist or a fan boy movie screening.
When you are out be approachable. Dont huddle in a group of girls and dont over do the black makeup and make sure you arent giving off a lesbo vibe. At least be seen with a drink so that guys can offer to buy you one. You need to give guys a feeling that they can approach you safely and not get their head handed to them.
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A
female
reader, SexKitten69 +, writes (28 November 2006):
 Hi, I'd like to start off by saying that the best way to attract a guy is simply to be yourself! Guys should like you for the person you are and not whats on the outside.
Other than a change of image there's not really much else i can suggest, when talking to a guy just act like yourself, laugh, joke and enjoy talking to them.
If they get to know you they would see past the rumours and you could put them straight on whatever has been said.
Getting a guy isn't the end of the world and surely once they get to know you they will really get to know your personality and if they don't like you so what, who cares what other people think? It's a big world out there with plenty of people in it.
Regards
xxxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006): Well I'm what I'd call extreme alternative and I have a fiance - it took me a while to find him believe me. But I stuck to trying to find a guy like me. I'm sure other goth guys would have no problem with you. But as we know they are few and far between. Whatever has been said about you - it was five years ago meeting people outside your own group of friends and enemies will mean you can start a fresh. When I met him my fiance I didn't try to flirt overtly and I didn't talk about guys. I spoke about music and seeing as we're both metal guitarists I talked alot about guitars. Alternative guys like girls who know their music and by talking about that you'll peak their interest and get onto other subjects so start from there and see what happens. They like girls who are knowledgable and know their stuff. Keep trying and I'm sure you'll get a bf.
Good luck
x
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